Copyright April 2, 2002-June 16, 2003 by Matthew Haldeman-Time

Rating: NC-17 for graphic male-male sex

Pairings: Thus far we've had JC/Justin, Nick/Drew/Brian, Nick/Jeff, Nick/Drew/Brian/Nick/Jeff, AJ/Lance, AJ/Howie, AJ/Kevin, Chris/Howie, and partridge/pear tree.

Disclaimer: The young men who comprise the Backstreet Boys, *NSYNC, and 98 Degrees are their own people. The author has not met anyone here described, nor does the author mean to suggest that these people act this way in real life. This writing is a work of fiction. I make no money from this venture.

Dedication: This slashfic is for Ewan McGregor and the Savage Garden slashwriters.

Wherein Drew won't go behind Brian's back, AJ can screw anybody he wants, and could JC be mellowing?

Notice: First, read "I Need You Tonight," "Boy Lead the Way to Ecstasy," "Not Easy," "No One," "Rest in Peace," "Destiny," and "Together." I know it sounds like a lot, but it'll only take you an hour or two.

        If Nick did deliver a beat-down, it would cause more tension between the five of them and *NSYNC, and Howie didn’t want that.  He didn’t want to put any more stress on Chris’s loyalties.  Being with Howie had caused Chris enough pain already; Howie wanted to keep all future heartache to a minimum.

        “Do you have time to make a stop?” Kevin asked him.

        “Yeah, I have nothing better to do,” Howie said.  “Where are we going?”

        “I want to buy Molly some flowers.  Some fan has started sending flowers to my house, and she’s a little jealous.”

        “Started sending flowers?” Howie repeated.  “More than once?”

        “Two days in a row, if that counts as a trend,” Kevin said.

        “I’ll come in with you,” Howie said.  “I need to pick up roses for Chris.”

        “Of course you do,” Kevin said.  “How could I have forgotten?”

        Howie smiled.

        Brian left his bags in the foyer and walked through the abandoned rooms.   The kitchen, where Nick had started a food fight while they were having, of all things, spaghetti.  The bathroom, where Drew had patched Nick up after a rough basketball game, and Brian had kissed him to make it all better.  The den, where they had perfected the art and timing of the commercial break make-out session.  The weight room, where sweat glistened on Drew’s hard, thick, well-defined muscles.  The laundry room, where Nick had made love to Brian on the folding table on a nest of warm clothes fresh from the dryer.  The scent of fabric softener still made Brian hard.

        The living room, where Nick had proposed.

        Brian went upstairs, to their bedroom.  He ran his finger over the thin layer of dust on Drew’s dresser.  He opened the closet and touched Nick’s clothes.  He sprayed Drew’s old cologne into the air.  Brian moved through the room slowly but restlessly.  He was looking for something that wasn’t there.  Not something, but someone.  Two someones.

        Brian sat on the floor and reached under the bed.  His fingers found the right box, and he pulled it towards himself.  It was a simple cardboard box, old and worn, patched with masking tape and, in some places, duct tape.  Across the top flap was written, in Nick’s young scrawl, “Memory Box, Nickolas G. Carter” and, in a more recent hand, the addendum, “Littrell Lachey.”

        A teddy bear that looked like it had been through some tough times.  A tiny plastic box shaped like a treasure chest, holding the first tooth Nick had lost.  Their first CD.  Aaron’s first CD.  The programs from the first five places Nick had performed.  A bundle of early fan mail.  A small photo album of family pictures.  The first magazine where they’d been on the cover; the first magazine where Nick had been on the cover alone.  Scraps of paper with important dates and events: the day they’d signed with Jive, the day he’d lost his virginity, the day he’d kissed Brian, the day he’d told his parents he was gay.

        Brian found new things.  Three small vials of glitter.  A jewelry box with two diamond earrings and a necklace in it, all of which he recognized as his from a few years ago.  A hat and a thong, both Drew’s.  Their wedding invitation.

        A bullet.

        Tucked in a corner were five envelopes.  For Kevin, someday.  For Howie, someday.  For AJ, someday.  For Brian, someday.  For Drew, someday.  Brian left them alone.

        Inside one of the box flaps, Nick had written, “I love Brian.”  Under that, instead of the date, he’d put, “every month/every day/every year.”

        Nick’s love for Brian hadn’t simply made it into the box, jumbled with childhood memories and career milestones; Nick’s love for Brian was etched onto the box itself, made a part of the box, never to be removed.  Any one of the rest of these items could be taken out at will, if Nick deemed them unworthy; but Brian was a permanent fixture.

        Brian slid the box back under the bed.  He’d found Nick.  He still needed to find Drew.

        It would be harder to find Drew.  Brian had full license to rifle through Nick’s possessions at will, but they weren’t supposed to go through Drew’s things.  Brian did respect Drew’s privacy, but sometimes he resented the walls Drew put between them.

        Brian got up and lay on the bed.  When he closed his eyes and held still, he could almost feel Drew at his side, Nick rolling towards him.  But they weren’t real, and when he opened his eyes, they were gone.

        Brian was tired of being alone.  He couldn’t be numb to the pain of it any longer.  Away, in a whole new setting, working with JC and playing with *NSYNC, he’d been able to pretend.  He’d kept his pain to manageable levels.  But no longer.  Now he was here, and they weren’t, and it was only serving to remind him how alone he was.  Not alone, for they were with him always, but he was tired of being with them only in spirit.

        He’d spent so many days without sunlight, the world grew dimmer every day.  Everything he saw seemed black around the edges, as the creeping darkness bled into his sight.  He had to see Nick again.

        Nick was coming tomorrow.  He’d see Nick tomorrow.  Tomorrow, tomorrow.  One more night.

        Drew.  He had to see Drew.  Nick was his spirit and his sunlight and his heart.  Drew was…  He wanted Drew to be…  It was so hard to…

        “The first time you touched me, I felt like a virgin, five years, ten years younger, my heart pounding, my body shivering, my skin burning.  My body ached waiting for your skin to brush against mine.  When you rose over me and looked into my eyes, I felt like you could see into my soul.  I wanted you to see into my soul.  I wanted you to see me, everything that I was, laid out for you, all of my secrets yours, all of my dreams come true.  I loved you then, as I love you now, and I knew that I’d love you forever.”

        He wanted to give himself to Drew again.  He wanted to let Drew have him, take him, however Drew wanted him.  He wanted to go to Drew and offer himself.  Whether Drew took him or not, whether Drew wanted to accept him or not, he still had to offer.

        He’d been away from Drew for too long, far too long.

        He’d been away from Nick for too long, far too long.  Nick was supposed to be by his side.  Nick belonged with him.  Nick was his.  If Brian had to reclaim what was his, to remind Nick and the world exactly where Nick was supposed to be at all times, then he would.

        He had to see them.

        Now.

        “Nope,” Drew said, placing the three of hearts on the four of clubs.

        “I’m having weird possessive needy hot flashes.”

        “Hmm.  Maybe Brian’s horny.”

        “God, I want him to own me again.”  Nick dropped to his back and sighed.  “It’s been too long.”

        Suddenly Drew was having hot flashes of his own.  Nick’s need for Brian did wicked things to Drew’s libido.  He cleared his throat.  “I was, uh…  As long as we’re on the subject,” Drew said.

        “What?” Nick asked, rolling onto his stomach, watching Drew’s game of solitaire.

        “I’m not…  I know it’s not…  I’m not exactly…”

        “What?” Nick asked.  “I can’t read your mind without more information.”

        “It’s going to sound conceited.  Just tell me no quickly and let me get over it.”

        “Okay.  Go for it.”

        “Do you think that Brian can sink the Titanic?”

        “Do I what?” Nick asked.  “Okay, hold on.  Processing.  Titanic.  Leonardo movie, Celine song, glacier - - iceberg!  Okay.  Oh, damn.”  Nick rolled onto his back again.  “Hold on, I’m thinking.  Brian.  We can all agree that I could sink that boat like a motherfucker.  You could sink it so damned well, there would have been no survivors.  Even Celine would be underwater.  But Brian…”

        Drew realized he was so nervous he’d put a club on a spade.

        “Yeah.  He has an iceberg.  We’ve uncovered the tip of yours, but his is still snowed under.  He’s hiding his.  Partly his fault, partly your fault.  But yeah, he has one.  It’s there.  He’d sink the Titanic as well as either one of us.”

        Drew dropped the cards and turned to Nick, leaning forward until his forehead was against Nick’s chest.  “Tell me you’re lying.”

        “No, it’s true.  It’s the truth.  He has a huge iceberg.  Drew, it’s Brian.  When it comes to us, when it comes to love, he doesn’t do anything halfway.  He’s not going to half-ass this thing.  He wants you to tie him up and come on his face and call him your bitch.  He wants to give to you and serve you and crawl around on his hands and knees worshipping you.  And if you think that’s bad, you have no idea how he feels about your dick.”

        Drew groaned.

        “Yep.”

        Drew raised his head.  “What you’re saying is…  He feels about me the way I feel about you.”

        “Yep,” Nick said again.  Then he realized what Drew was saying.  “Oh.  Damn.”

        “Nick.  What are we going to do?” Drew asked.  “I can’t…  You’re already afraid of me, and I’ve been terrified of him.  We can’t handle all of this.”

        “Give Brian what he’s asking for,” Nick said again.  “You don’t have to take the initiative right away.  Just, if he asks for it, do what he wants.  I know I can uncover my whole fucking iceberg and hand it to him and he’ll know exactly what to do with it, so I’m not worried about that.  And us…  Drew, I know I pulled away and ran out on you, and I’m sorry. I won’t do that again.  I’ll be here for you.  I’ll be your safety net.  You can trust me.  We’ll take it however.”

        Drew nodded.  “Okay.”

        “It’ll work out.”

        “I hope so.”

        “You hope so?  Drew, what kind of shit is that?  This is us!  The three of us.  We love each other so much, JC wishes he were this in love.  You and me, we’re so tight, we have it like nobody else.  Me and Brian, come on, we’ve been solid since I was in diapers.  All that leaves is you and Brian, and you’re married to each other.  I know how seriously he takes that commitment, and I know how much it means to you, so it’s guaranteed neither one of you is ever walking away from it.”

        “I’m afraid of losing him,” Drew said.  “I’m afraid of losing you.”

        “Losing me?” Nick asked.  “Where do you think I’m going?  The love and the trust and the sex and - - Drew, I’m responsible for you now.  I won’t leave you.”

        “If Brian and I…  I know you’d choose him.  It wouldn’t even be a choice, and I don’t blame you for it.”

        “First of all, I don’t want to hear you talking about you and Brian splitting up, because that is never going to happen, and you’re only scaring yourself.  You could never do anything so horrible he’d leave you.  Second, I don’t want you speculating on which of you I’d pick if I had to make that choice.  I wouldn’t choose.  I’d never choose.  And you know what?  If we were in some other dimension and I did have to choose, you’d have a fifty percent chance of me picking you.”

        Drew smiled.  “Really?”

        “Yes, really.  So stop hurting yourself on purpose.  Nobody’s leaving anybody.”  Nick pulled Drew closer, until Drew gave up on sitting and lay down on top of Nick.  “Tell me you love me.”

        “I love you,” Drew said.

        “Tell me you love Brian.”

        “I love Brian.”

        “Tell me you’re going to do your best to relax about all of this.”

        “I’ll try to relax.”

        “Okay.  Good Drew.  Give me a kiss.”

        Drew’s lips brushed Nick’s.

        “Is there anything special you want me to tell Brian when I see him?” Nick asked.

        Drew hesitated.  “I don’t know.  I can’t think of anything.  You can tell him…tell him I love him.”

        “Of course I’ll tell him that,” Nick said.

        “I don’t know what…  There are a lot of things I want to say to him.  I want to tell him about so much…  Will you thank him for me?”

        “Sure.  For what?”

        “For letting me borrow you.”

        “It’s not borrowing.”

        “No, it is.”  Drew smiled.

        Nick rolled his eyes.  “Fine.  I’ll thank him for you, for letting you borrow his toys.”

        “Thank you.”

        “You’re welcome.  You know what I should do?”

        Drew grinned.

        “Besides give you head.”

        “Oh.  What?”

        “I should screw you and get you all excited and expose your iceberg, and then let Brian do you.  To let him feel it.”

        “Try it and I’ll hurt you.”

        “Come on, it’ll be fun.”

        “Don’t even-“

        “Okay, okay.  I won’t.  How come you can fuck me as Brian’s stand-in, but Brian can’t have a taste of-“

        “It’s my iceberg,” Drew said.  “I don’t even want you to know it’s there, much less have Brian…  It’s embarrassing.”

        “Embarrassing?  Losing control of your bladder onstage, that’s embarrassing.  Letting Brian feel your need for me, that’s just fucking sexy.”

        “In your opinion.”

        “Does this mean you’re not going to let me touch Brian while he’s in heat for you?”

        “Maybe.”

        “I don’t know if I could, though.  It’s Brian.  That kind of need, from him…  It’s for you.  It’s not for me.  And I guess that’s why I shouldn’t let him - - hey, then why the hell does everybody get to screw me?  You were all over me when I was Brian’s bitch.  You got off in me twice!  That’s not fair.”

        “Hey, that’s different.  There was no way I could resist.  You would have let Brian do anything, and since Brian wasn’t there, I thought, well…”

        “You decided to get a piece.”

        “Yeah.”

        “It was good, though.  I enjoyed it.  I got a little Brian and a little Drew all mixed in there together.  It felt like he was really there, giving it to me.”

        “Thank you for staying here with me.”

        “Drew.”

        “I’m serious.  You could have left at any time, and you know I would have understood, but you’ve stayed.”

        “Haven’t we talked about this already?”

        “Yes, but you like to pretend it’s not as important as it is.  I want you to know that…  I know you’ve sacrificed to be here with me.  I know it’s hurt you a lot.  I know why you hold me tight at night.”

        “I always cuddle you up in bed.”

        Drew shook his head.  “It’s different.  I can feel it.  It hurts you to be away from him.  You’ve cried for your pain.  You’ve grieved for it.  I’ve seen it.”

        “I stayed because I love you, and I want to be here with you.  I’m glad I’ve stayed.  You know I would stay longer.”

        “I know.”

        “I want to stay here with you until your tour’s over, so we can go home together.”

        “I know.  Thank you.”

        “You can’t tell Brian how hard it was for me without him.  I didn’t want you knowing, and I don’t want him knowing, either.”

        “I think he already knows.  All right, I won’t say anything.”

        “Good.”

        “It amazes me.  To be a witness to your love for each other.  To be in this relationship.  You so clearly have a strong bond, a connection, a love that puts other loves to shame.  You love Brian, and he loves you, so much, that I…  All anyone has to do is watch you together for ten minutes to see that there’s something between you that no one else can ever touch.  And the sex is unbelievable.”

        “I knew you liked watching us have sex.”

        “Nick, you and Brian...  You have something, your love, it’s…  Do you realize how rare and beautiful it is?”

        “Do you realize you’re right in the middle of it?” Nick asked.

        Drew said the first thing that came to mind.  “No.”

        “Drew.  If I weren’t around, would you love Brian the same way you do now?”

        “No,” Drew said.  “But my experience of him wouldn’t be the same without you, and he wouldn’t be the same without you.”

        “Exactly.”

        “But you and Brian-“

        “Brian and I have a history and a friendship and yeah, a lot of love for each other.  We did have a lot going on before you showed up.  But this new relationship we have, this new thing between us, it’s different from the way it used to be.  I’m different, he’s different, and you’re here.  The relationship Brian and I have right now isn’t the same one we had before, and a lot of that has to do with you.”

        “Oh.”

        “You’ve changed things.  You’ve changed us.  Brian wouldn’t be the same if I weren’t around, but I wouldn’t be the same if you weren’t around.  I’m all mixed in with your love for him, and you’re all mixed in with his love for me.  He loves seeing us together, watching us fuss at each other, watching the way we talk to each other.  I get responses from you that you won’t give anyone else, and I treat you differently from the way I treat him.  He loves watching us together and knowing we’re in love.  And oh hell damn, I get off on seeing you two do anything together, whether it’s making love or talking or cleaning up the kitchen.  You’re fucking cute together, all grown up and in love, it makes me fall in love.”

        “You are in love,” Drew said.

        “So you’ve only fallen in love with Brian once?”

        Drew smiled.  “No.  I guess not.”

        “I’m not sure how it happens, but all I have to do is turn around and catch one of you smiling a certain way, and I fall in love like it’s new all over again.  You two don’t have any idea how sexy and cute you are.”

        “Neither do you.  You act like you do, but really you’re faking it.”

        “I’m good at faking it.”

        “You’re very good, but it’s still fake.”

        “Do we have to discuss my fucked-up mental health all of the time?”

        “No, we can talk about something else.”

        “Like what?”

        “Let’s talk about exactly which sexual acts you’re going to engage in when you see Brian tomorrow.”

        Nick grinned.  “Now you’re talking.”

        “Hey,” Justin said.  “Have you seen Chris?”

        “Joey took him somewhere.  Do you have a minute?”

        “Yeah, sure.”  Justin walked over and sat beside Lance on the couch, tucking one foot under himself.  “What’s going on?”

        “It’s about Brian.  I was way out of line.  I didn’t get a chance to apologize to him before he left, and now I’m afraid that when we get back, there might be some kind of trouble.”

        “Trouble?” Justin asked.

        “I lost control, and I took my anger at myself out on him.  It was unjustified, and he knows it, and I know that by now he’s told everyone else about it.  Howie obviously doesn’t like me, or he never would have slept with AJ, and I know Kevin hates me.  Kevin would take any excuse to come after me.”

        “Brian wouldn’t want anyone to start something,” Justin said.  “He’s not going to rile them up.”

        “What about Nick and Drew?” Lance asked.

        Justin thought about it.  “You might have a valid concern there.  But you won’t be seeing them for a while, and by then, their anger will have faded.  They’ll be more interested in getting home to Brian than in taking revenge.”

        “I’m not sure about that.”

        “Yeah.  Well, look at it this way.  We’re not letting anybody beat up our Lance.  It’ll be five against two.  We can take them.”

        Lance grinned.  “Thanks.”

        “No problem.  We’ve got your back, man.  Anybody gives you any trouble, you call us.”

        Joey walked in with Chris and JC.  JC was still talking, but Joey had stopped listening.  Justin and Lance were on the sofa.  They seemed to be trying to share one cushion, ignoring two-thirds of the potential butt room.  Lance had one arm along the back of the couch, inviting Justin into his personal space; Justin had a hand on Lance’s thigh and was smiling too warmly into Lance’s eyes.  Lance had the “come ride my dick” look that Joey had seen him give guys in clubs, and Justin had the trusting, “I have the best friends in the world” look he’d picked up from JC.

        “Hey, baby,” JC said, leaning in to kiss Justin’s cheek.  His tongue gave a promising, quick, sexy lick up Justin’s temple, right where a new curl was sprouting in Justin’s sideburns.  “Did you call Jane?” JC asked Lance, one knee behind Justin on the sofa, his fingers in Justin’s hair.

        “Yeah,” Lance said.  He looked at Joey and casually leaned back, out of Justin’s personal space.  Joey knew that Lance was doing it out of respect for his wishes, and was grateful.  He wondered how long it would last.

        “You sent the fax, right?” Chris asked.

        “Yes,” Lance said.

        “They got it?” Chris asked.

        “Yes, they got it,” Lance said.  “They got it last week, and they still have it.  Nothing’s changed since the last three hundred times you asked me.”

        “I’m making sure,” Chris said.  “It’s important.  Did you-“

        “Yes,” Lance said.  “Whatever you’re asking me, yes.  I did.”

        “Let’s go,” JC said to Chris.  “If you keep bugging Lance, he’ll stop doing things for us, and I need him to be the Fools’s business manager.”

        “They got the fax, right?” Chris asked.  “They let you know they got the fax?” he called as JC walked him out of earshot.

        “What fax?” Justin asked.

        “It’s the latest step in Chris’s deluded fantasy,” Lance said, standing.  “Sometimes I wish I hadn’t sent it.”  He walked away, his words ringing bitterly in Joey’s ears.

        “Joey,” Justin said, and Joey stepped closer.  “What happened to him?”

        “Love,” Joey said.  “AJ.  Heartache.”

        “I wish he’d take AJ back,” Justin said.  “He was happier then.”

        “AJ never should have cheated.”

        “Lance never should have cheated,” Justin said.

        “One date with a guy he barely knew is not the same as screwing your long-time best friend.  Two of them.”

        “You can’t count Kevin,” Justin said.  “They’d broken up by then.”

        “Five minutes earlier!  For all we know, AJ and Kevin were doing it before AJ and Lance broke up.”

        “They weren’t,” Justin said.

        “How do you know?” Joey asked.

        “Brian told me.”

        “Oh.”  Okay.

        “AJ was just sharing his body with Kevin.  That wasn’t love.  Everyone’s making too big a deal out of it.”

        “Did Brian tell you that?”

        “No.  He wouldn’t tell me a whole lot.  But come on.  You don’t jump from a long-term relationship with Lance, the first guy you’ve ever had, someone you were deep in love with, and suddenly end up in bed with your best friend and poof! you’re in love with him.  It doesn’t work that way,” Justin said.  “He wasn’t in love with both of them.  He was only in love with Lance.  Kevin was his replacement.”

        “Kevin was in love with him,” Joey said.  “If Chris were in love with you, would you screw him to use him while you were in love with someone else?  That would be a shitty thing to do.”

        “Unless he felt sorry for Kevin and it was pity sex, not using sex,” Justin said.

        “I don’t think we’ll ever figure AJ out,” Joey said.

        “Fuck ‘im,” Justin said.  “He hurt Lance.  He’s an asshole.  That’s all we need to know.”

        “If Lance goes back to him, we’re going to have to deal with him again.”

        “If Lance goes back to him, he’d better treat Lance like royalty, or he’ll be hearing from us.”

        “Amen.  Preach it.”  They bumped fists.  “Long live Lance.”

        “Long live Lance.”

        “I like to look,” Howie said.  “There’s always the chance something else will interest me.”

        “Not likely,” Kevin said.  “What is this?” he asked, gesturing to a purple flower.

        “Hyacinth,” Howie said.  “You think Molly would like it?”

        “No.  That’s what the fan sent to me.  It’s pretty.”

        “It is pretty,” Howie agreed.  He found the roses.  “Here we go.  This is what I like.”

        “She also sent daffodils,” Kevin said.  “I thought that was interesting.  They’re nice, but they’re not really a bouquet flower, are they?”

        “They wouldn’t be my first choice,” Howie said.  “Maybe I should get a different color this time.”

        “What about this one?” Kevin asked, touching a dark crimson rose.  “Not quite red.”

        “Oh, no,” Howie said.  “That one’s for mourning.  Grieving mourning, not seven a.m. morning.”

        “Oh.  How do you know that?”

        “When Brian and Nick told me about Drew’s tattoos, the flowers he got, I looked up a few flowers out of curiosity.  The different colors of roses mean different things.  I forgot most of them, but I remembered to shy away from that one, because I’m not trying to send that message.”

        “Oh.  Do you think Chris would know or even care?”

        “No, but I don’t want to put the idea out there.”  Howie had found the red roses in full bloom.  “These are just right.”  He touched the petals, checking for imperfections.  “How many, do you think?  Four dozen?”

        “Four dozen is forty-eight,” Kevin said.  “What are you going to do with forty-eight roses?”

        “You’re right.  Six dozen.”

        “I don’t think they have that many.  You’re out of your mind.”

        “They’re for Chris.”  Howie gave them a gentle sniff.  “They’re perfect, beautiful, traditional, and sweet, just like he is.”  He smiled.  “I’ll take seven dozen, just to be sure.”

        “You are not going to buy seven dozen roses for one person,” Kevin said.  “Are we talking about Chris Kirkpatrick?  Perfect, beautiful, traditional, and sweet?  How about crazy and annoying?”

        “How about you wait in the car?” Howie asked.

        “Do you honestly believe he’s any of those things?” Kevin asked.

        “I honestly believe he’s every one of those things, and I honestly believe that if you keep talking I’ll give you a personal demonstration of how I broke Jerome’s nose.”  Howie smiled.  “All right?”

        “All right,” Kevin said.  “Beth told me the cut you left on his cheek is going to leave a permanent scar.”

        “He should have kept his hands off Chris.”

        “Oh, JC.”  Justin’s eyes closed at the soft touch of JC’s lips.

        “I love you, Justin.”

        “Oh, I love you, too, JC.”  Justin wrapped his arms around JC.  At the testing flicker of JC’s tongue, Justin’s mouth opened.  His tongue slid against JC’s, caressing, inviting.

        “Oh, baby.”

        “Mmm…yes…”

        “Oh, baby,” Chris moaned.

        “Oh, yes, yes, yes,” Joey cried out.

        “Oh, baby!” Chris moaned, louder.

        “Oh, yes, yes, yes!” Joey cried in ecstasy.

        Justin stopped kissing JC and turned his head.  “Can we help you?”

        “Sam’s looking for you,” Joey said.

        “You kind of turned me on, there,” Chris said to Joey.

        “You weren’t bad, either,” Joey said.

        “Thanks.”

        Justin kissed JC, soft and wet, giving JC his tongue.  “I’ll see you later.”

        JC kissed him again and let him go.  “Later, baby.”

        “How are you two, uh, feeling?” Joey asked JC once Justin had gone.

        “Fine,” JC said, puzzled.

        “I mean, after the last breakdown and everything, and then spending time curled around each other shutting out everything else, you’re feeling better?”

        “We’re fine,” JC said.

        “You seem fine,” Chris said.  “You seem close in a healthy way.  Calm and friendly and everything.  But, um, what’s with the no sex?”

        “It hasn’t come up,” JC said.  “No, not like that,” he said, when Joey gave him a knowing grin.  “It hasn’t been the right time.  We’re enjoying each other the way we are.  Maybe we’ll make love tonight.  Maybe we’ll wait until we get home.”

        “Okay.  So we shouldn’t be worried about anything,” Chris said.

        “There’s nothing to worry about,” JC said.  “We’re fine.  Things are more positive than they’ve truly been for a long time.”

        “That’s good,” Joey said.

        “You don’t believe me,” JC said.

        “We’re afraid to,” Chris said.  “Every time we get relieved and think, finally, this is it, smooth sailing, one of you flips out and there’s another nightmare to get through.  We’ve had too many false reports.  The trust is gone.”

        “I’m telling you,” JC said.  “Honestly.  We’re all right.”

        “I’m tempted to believe him,” Joey said to Chris.

        “Let’s ask Justin,” Chris said.  “We’ll need his testimony to get the full story.”

        Drew looked up with a smile.  “You can call me Drew.”

        “How do you know she was talking to you?” Nick asked.  “Maybe she was talking to me.”

        “She said Lachey, not Carter.”

        “My last name’s Lachey,” Nick said.  “My last-last name.  Take out all of the stuff in between, I’m Nick Lachey.”

        “You are not Nick Lachey.”

        “I’m Nick Lachey!”

        “You are not - - fine.  You’re Nick Lachey.  I’m sure she was talking to you.  Go ahead.”

        “Thank you.”  Nick turned to the woman.  “Yes?”

        “Your flight out tomorrow morning has been moved back a few hours.  Mr. Alden is holding your ticket.”

        “Why?”

        “I don’t know, sir.”

        “Okay.  Thanks.”  She left.  “Weird.”

        “I guess something happened with the airline,” Drew said.

        “I guess,” Nick said.

        “You are not Nick Lachey.”

        “I am Nick Lachey!  Nick is my first name, Lachey is my last name.”

        “You have three last names.”

        “Yes, but my last-last name is the most official one, and it’s Lachey.  Carter Littrell Lachey.”

        “Why is the last-last name the official one?”

        “That’s where they put the man’s name.  When men and women get married, and they hyphenate their names, the man’s name goes last.”

        “I know that, but since we’re all men, I don’t think it works the same.”

        “I do.  I’m Nick Lachey.”

        “There already is a Nick Lachey!”

        “So?  I’m the new and improved version.  Younger…  Better-looking…”

        “Not as well-hung…”

        “No longer speaking to you…  Never screwing you again…”

        “Not as mature…”

        “Thinking what a horrible person you are…”

         “Definitely not as sexy…”

        “Hating you for the rest of my life…”

        “Hey, Chris.”

        “Hey, Justin.”

        “Hey, Joey.”

        “Hey, Justin.”

        “Hey, Chris.”

        “Hey, Justin.”

        “Hey, J-  What do you guys want?!”

        “Oh.  Nothing,” Joey said.

        “Nothing,” Chris agreed.

        “How have you been, uh, doing?” Joey asked.

        “Fine,” Justin said.  “How about you?”

        “Oh, great, great,” Joey said.

        “Great, great,” Chris echoed, nodding.

        “Great,” Justin said.

        Joey nodded.

        “Yep,” Chris said.

        “So, uh, how’s your marriage?” Joey asked.

        “My marriage is going very well, thank you,” Justin said.  “JC and I are very happy together.  Have you been smoking something?”

        “When you say very happy together, what do you mean by that?” Joey asked.

        “Is it like a happy happy, or a sex-based happy, or a things are slowly crashing down around you happy, or an elated ecstatic too high to be maintained happy?” Chris asked.  “For example.”

        “It’s a happy happy,” Justin said.  “Normal happy.  What’s going on?”

        “We’re waiting for the other shoe to drop,” Joey said.

        “Any minute now,” Chris said.

        “There are no shoes dropping,” Justin said.  “No shoe of any kind will be dropping at any time.  JC and I are very happy.  We’re in love, and we’re feeling very close and secure right now.”

        “What about sex?” Joey asked.

        “Yeah, what about sex?” Chris asked.

        “We’re taking it slowly,” Justin said.

        “Slowly?  Taking sex slowly?” Joey asked.  “I’m sorry, I was looking for Justin Timberlake Chasez.  We must have the wrong person.”

        “It’s not about sex right now,” Justin said.  “It’s about being happy just being comfortable together.  It’s the simple touches that mean the most.  I’m not interested in sex right now, and neither is JC.”

        “Obviously we’re not talking about the same JC,” Joey said.

        “Obviously,” Chris agreed.

        “We’ve had the wrong priorities for a while now,” Justin said.  “We’re trying to get things right.”

        “I don’t know if I buy it,” Joey said.

        “I want to buy it,” Chris said.

        “Oh, I want to buy it,” Joey said.  “I’m just not sure if I do.”

        “Further research is necessary,” Chris said.

        “I agree,” Joey said.

        “We’ll need to speak with the experts,” Chris said.

        “I concur,” Joey said.  “I’ll call Brian.  You call Nick.”

        Nick looked around.  “Yes.  Why?”

        “Good.”  Nick closed the door.  “Time for a Nick conference.”

        “Oh, god.  About what?”

        “Calm down.  I’m not here to harass you.  Take a seat.”

        “Let me guess.  You’re staying.”

        “No, your luck is holding.  I’m still going.  I just have a few last-minute instructions before I go.”

        “Give them to Jeff.”

        “Jeff. That’s one.  You still haven’t pulled rank on him and made his idol-worshipping gay boy fantasies come true.”

        “Carter-“

        “I told you, it doesn’t have to be a major thing.  Just let him know you’re the front man, he’s your second.  Seduce him.”

        “No.”

        “He wants you to.”

        “You don’t know what Jeff wants.”

        “We’ve talked about this.  You want it.  He wants it.  What are you afraid of?”

        “I’m not afraid of anything.  I don’t want to do it.”

        “Coward.  He’s your husband.  It’s up to you to make him happy and give him what he wants.”

        “Is this why you came here?”

        “One of the reasons.  What else?  Drew.  I want you to make sure he’s happy.  He’s your little brother and I want you to look out for him.”

        “I do look out for him.”

        “He’s going to be lonely and he’s going to start pulling back from stuff.  You make sure he doesn’t get sad and worried.”

        “I’m not going to let him sit around pining over you.”

        “Good.”

        “Is that all?”

        “Pull rank on Jeff, keep Drew happy…  What else…  I want you to find out what Justin J. is keeping from us with these secret phone calls.  I think he’s having an affair.  What else…  Brian.”

        “What about Brian?”

        “You and Jeff need to calm down.  I’m not letting Brian dictate who my friends are.  You guys are Drew’s family, and you’re my family, and Brian’s going to have to deal with it.  Okay?”

        “Nick-“

        “Brian can get scary.  But don’t worry about it.  What’s the number one thing ruling a guy’s thought processes?”

        Nick started to turn red.

        “Exactly.  No offense to you or Drew or girls or anybody, but I’m the hottest thing Brian’s ever put his dick in.  I can get what I want.  He’ll learn to live with it.”

        “I don’t want…  If you’re not sure-“

        “I am sure,” Nick said.  “Jeff’s my man.  He and I are tight.  I don’t need to be protected from him.  Besides, Jeff’s still nervous around me, and I don’t want that, and Brian causing trouble isn’t going to help, so I’m going to make Brian knock it off.  Okay?”

        “Okay.  Thank you.”

        “You’re welcome.  I think that’s it.  Hey, you wouldn’t mind if I gave Jeff a good-bye kiss, would you?”

        “Yes, I would.”

        “Prude.”

        “Hey, it’s Kevin.”

        “Hey, how did Molly like her flowers?”

        “It’s hard to tell.  While I was gone, two more bouquets arrived for me.”

        “Man.  This is a nice fan.  What did you get this time?”

        “Pink carnations and red tulips.”

        “Nice.  Good taste.”

        “I was wondering…  It all sounds kind of silly to me, but I was wondering if these flowers were supposed to mean something.”

        “Well, so far, four different kinds of flowers, that might be a strange message all together.  I don’t know.”

        “Do you have a book or something?”

        “No, I don’t.  We could look it up on-line.”

        “Sounds good.  How?”

        “Do you want me to come over?”

        “Would you mind?”

        “Can I meet Molly?”

        “Yeah, come on over.”

        “We need him,” Chris said.  “He’s the only one who can help us!”

        Lance gave them a look.

        “You’ll have to call Nick,” Joey said.

        “Never!” Chris shouted, aghast.

        “The deal was, I call Brian, you call Nick.”

        “You didn’t call Brian, so I don’t have to call Nick,” Chris said.

        “I tried.  You have to try, too.”

        “You call him.”

        “You call him!”

        “You call him!”

        “You call him!”

        “Let’s try Brian again,” Chris suggested.

        “He won’t answer.  Call Nick.

        “Never!”

        “Fine.  What’s his number?”

        “You’re calling?” Chris asked, shocked.

        “It’s our last resort, but someone has to do it,” Joey said.

        “My hero,” Chris said, folding his hands under his chin.

        “What is his number?” Joey asked again.

        “1-800-never mind JC will get pissed,” Chris said, as JC moved into view.  “Hey, JC, what’s Carter’s number?”

        “You’re calling Nick?” JC asked, surprised.

        “We need his professional opinion on something,” Joey said.

        “What’s the world’s oldest profession again?” Chris asked.

        “Watch it,” JC said.  “Didn’t you learn anything from Brian?”

        “Don’t get too close to Lance on one of his bad days?” Chris guessed.

        “Funny,” Lance said.

        JC gave Joey Nick’s number and went back to Justin.

        “Here goes nothing.”  Joey dialed.

        “My hero,” Chris whispered.

        “Carter, this is Joey.”

        “Fatone.  Let’s see.  You mouth off about AJ, you mouth off about Kevin, you decided to become a phobic prick and kick Howie off of your tour, and you’re calling me?  Like I want to talk to you?”

        “It’s about JC and Justin.”

        “I’m listening.”

        “Have you talked to them lately?”

        “Not for a couple days.  They weren’t picking up last time I tried.  I haven’t actually talked to them since I sent JC over the edge and Brian finished him off.”

        “Things have been weird around here.  Kind of crazy.  But now things have really settled down, and they’re acting normal.  Happy normal.  Calm, settled down normal.  We’re wondering what’s going on?”

        “And you think that from another tour without having talked to them, I can explain this to you?”

        “Yeah.”

        “Okay.  Joey.  Let me talk to them.  That might help.”

        “Hold on.”

        Nick rolled his eyes and settled into a more comfortable position.

        “This is JC.”

        “Hey, princess.  How’ve you been?”

        “I’m good.”

        “Hey, sorry about pushing your buttons the other day.  I wasn’t trying to make you crazy, I was just sick of your bullshit.”

        “I know, man, I’m sorry.”

        “Listen, are you really okay?  You and Justin?”

        “Oh, we’re doing great,” JC said.  “It’s almost like we’re new again.  There’s none of the deep pain, there’s no anger, there’s nothing but this budding love between us.”

        “How’s your sex life?”

        “That’s on hold.  Not on hold, but…it’s in the future.  We’re not there right now.  We’re taking our time and - - wait.  Are Joey and Chris trying to get you to feel me out?”

        “Yeah.  They think you’re nuts and they don’t know what’s going on.”

        “Nick, man, I’m telling you, we’re fine.  Justin and I are in a good place right now, and we’re just relaxing and staying there.”

        “Let me talk to Justin.”

        “I’m telling you, everything’s okay.”

        “Sure it is.  Let me talk to Justin.”

        “Hold on.”

        Nick tapped his fingers.

        “Carter, what do you want now?” Justin asked.

        “You’re not giving it up anymore?”

        “Why are you always crude?”

        “Why are you always bitchy?”

        “JC and I don’t have to have sex every hour on the hour to prove we’re in love.  We don’t all have your issues.”

        “Fucker.  How’s your mental health?  Feel like having a breakdown?”

        “No, the one I just came out of was bad enough.  I’m not in the mood for going through that again.”

        “So you love JC?”

        “Yes, I love JC.  What kind of question is that?”

        “Just checking.  Show him some skin.”

        “What?  Why?”

        “Humor me.”

        “Fine.  There.”

        “And?”

        “And he smiled at me and went back to talking to Joey.”

        “How’s the lust vibe?”

        “Kind of a low, steady hum.  It’s been that way all day.  We’re letting it flow.  You don’t have to act on every sexual impulse.”

        “Justy, if I acted on every sexual impulse I had, my mouth would be too full of Drew’s dick to have this conversation right now.  Okay, let me talk to Chris.”

        “Chris?  I thought you were on the phone with Joey.”

        “Joey’s an ass.  Let me talk to Chris.”

        “You like Chris?”

        “Howie’s in love with him.  That places him in a higher category of respect.  Somewhere below JC but far above you.”

        “Hold on.  Chris!”

        Nick waited.  Short and sweet?  More like short and slow.

        “Hello?”

        “Hey.  You guys need to hold a brand-new conference.  JC and Justin are showing signs of actually having mental health.  I don’t know if that means you should hold off on your kidnapping plot, or go for it because it’s the perfect time.”

        “Are you saying they’re actually…sane and happy?”

        “Yes.  Talk it over and get back to me.  Hey.  Shorty.  What’s the deal with Brian?”

        “Okay, see you later.”

        Nick glared.  The little fucker had hung up on him.  Bastard.

        “That rules out the idea that she’s trying to send me some sort of message,” Kevin said.

        “Seems like it,” Howie agreed.  “Unless someone’s offended you recently?”

        “Lance and Joey have, but they aren’t the types to send apology bouquets.”

        “Not to you, anyway.”

        Kevin flicked him in the back of the head.

        “What else?  Pink carnations.  Solid color?”

        “Yeah.”

        “Carnations in solid colors mean yes.”

        “Yes what?” Kevin asked.

        “It just says yes.”

        “Yes what?” Kevin asked.

        “Yes to whatever,” Howie said.  “Here, daffodils.  Love me, affection returned, desire.”

        “Finally, a message that makes sense,” Kevin said.

        “Affection returned,” Howie said.  “Nice.  What else did you get?”

        “Red tulips.”

        “Okay.  Tulip.  Red.  Believe me, declaration of love.”

        “Fits in with the daffodils.”

        “I don’t think she’s trying to send you a message.”

        “I think she just likes to send a variety of flowers,” Kevin agreed.  “They’re nice.”

        “They’re very nice,” Howie said.

        “You want to take some?”

        “No, my house is going to be full of flowers tomorrow as it is.”

        “I don’t think that after being away from you, roses are the first thing on Chris’s mind.”

        “They help to set the mood,” Howie said, and winked.

        “I don’t think that you need much outside help in setting the mood.  You set it pretty well all by yourself.”

        Howie smiled.  “Are you coming on to me?”

        “Believe me, no.”  He handed Howie a pink carnation.

        Howie laughed.

        “Best time,” Lance said.  “They’re the sanest we’ve seen them in a long time.  They have some balance.  That means that separating them will be easier on them.”

        “It’s too new and fresh,” Chris said.  “We should give them time.”

        “We have to do it now during this window,” Lance said.  “Right now, when we get home, before 98 Degrees gets off tour and the Fools start recording for real.  If we wait, and they get off tour, and JC has to be in the studio every day working on this album, he’ll never make it.  We have to do it now.”

        “We have to give them time to be sure they’re really settled into this sanity thing,” Chris said.

        “Joey?” Lance asked.

        Joey looked at Lance.

        “Don’t get sucked in,” Chris warned Joey.  “He’s evil now.”

        “I’m not evil,” Lance said.

        “I think Lance is right,” Joey said.

        “You shouldn’t have made eye contact,” Chris told Joey.

        “We’re sticking with our plan,” Lance said.  “We’ll give Justin one night back at home with JC, and then we’re breaking them up.”

        “Temporarily separating them,” Chris said.

        “Right.  That’s what I meant,” Lance said, and walked away.

        “Evil,” Chris said.  “Joey, you keep a close eye on him.  What am I saying?  He runs all over you.  Why do you let him run all over you?”

        “He’s Lance,” Joey said.

        “There’s a detailed answer,” Chris said.  “Here, call Carter and tell him it’s still on.”

        “You call him.”

        “You call him!”

        “I already did call him once.”

        “I talked to him last.”

        “He called me a phobic prick.”

        “He called me shorty.  Let’s get Lance to call him.”

        “Nick still doesn’t know about Brian, does he?”

        “If he did, we’d know about it, so my guess is, no.”

        “You call him.”

        “You call him.  I know!  I’ll call Howie, and Howie can tell him.”

        “I’ll call him,” Joey said.

        Chris grinned.  “I knew that would work.”

        “Like what?” Nick asked, avoiding his gaze.

        “Half of the time like I'm a piece of meat, and half of the time like I’m frightening you.”

        “I’m not looking at you,” Nick said.

        “All right, what’s going on?” Jeff asked, crossing his arms.

        “Nothing,” Nick said.

        “Would you look at me?”

        Nick looked at him, trying to look normal and maybe a little bored.

        “If you’re going to spend all day looking at me crazy, I’d like to know why.”

        “I’ll stop looking at you.”

        “That’s not what I said.”

        “I’m not looking at you crazy!  And don’t pull the mature act on me, you know I hate it.”

        “Nick, I’m not trying to start a fight.  I just want to know what you keep thinking about.”

        “Nothing.  I’m not thinking about anything.”

        “Okay.  I’m coming at this the wrong way.”  Jeff uncrossed his arms, stepped forward, and kissed Nick’s mouth.  “You can check me out and give my body speculative, lecherous glances as much as you want.  But stop looking like if I knew what you were thinking, I’d kick you out of my life.  Whatever you do, I’ll never kick you out of my life.”

        Nick took another kiss.

        “All right.  You may resume checking out my ass.”

        “I’m not checking out your ass.”

        Jeff waited.

        “I was checking out your ass,” Nick admitted.  “And a few other parts.  You have a great body, and I…enjoy it.”

        “It’s okay.  I don’t mind.”  Jeff ran a finger down the center of Nick’s chest.  “Were there any parts you wanted to…touch?  While we’re alone?”

        “Jeff, they’re coming in any minute.”

        “Then you’d better hurry.”

        Nick kissed him, right hand quick to slip under Jeff’s shirt.  He moaned against Nick’s tongue as Nick’s hand rubbed across his pec, then ground his hips against Nick’s as Nick’s fingers teased his nipple.  Heat and lust had been rolling off Nick in waves all afternoon, and Jeff had been itching to respond to it.  Nick pushed at his shirt, and he snatched it off over his head, tossing it aside, grunting as Nick backed him into the wall.

        Nick’s mouth was in full possession of his mouth, but Jeff’s hands wanted to be in full possession of Nick’s dick.  He popped open Nick’s fly and worked his hand down inside Nick’s underwear, rubbing up the shaft of Nick’s erection.

        “God, Jeff, I just want to fuck you,” Nick said, groaning at the grip of Jeff’s hand, ducking his head to kiss Jeff’s chest.

        “Damn!  Holy shit!”

        The door closed.

        Nick slowly raised his head and met Jeff’s eyes.

        Silence.

        Jeff eased his hand out of Nick’s pants.

        Nick zipped up.  “I will be very happy to see him go.”

        “It’s not his fault,” Jeff said.  “We knew they were coming back.”

        “They should have knocked.”

        “It’s a public room.”

        Nick handed Jeff his shirt.  “Let’s not open the door.”

        “We may have to at some point.”  Jeff pulled on his shirt and ran his hand over his hair.  “We’re all adults.  They didn’t see much.  We weren’t doing anything they haven’t done.”

        “You think Drew was there, too?” Nick asked.

        “He must have been.  Nick wouldn’t have closed the door that quickly.”

        “Nick would have taken a seat and watched.  With a running commentary.”

        “Probably.”  Jeff gave Nick a brief kiss and opened the door.  “Sorry about that.”

        “You didn’t have to stop,” Nick said.  “We can wait.  Go back to what you were doing.”

        “Sorry,” Drew said to Jeff.  “We didn’t know you were…busy.”

        “You leave Nick and Jeff alone together for more than five minutes, and you think they’re not getting into it?” Nick asked Drew.

        “Carter,” Nick said.

        “I really do feel sorry for Justin J.,” Nick said.

        “I really feel sorry for-“

        “Nick,” Jeff said, a warning.

        “Never mind,” Nick said.  “I’m going to go…check on something.”  He left.

        “Poor guy,” Nick said.  “He was so close to getting laid.”

        “The other guys must have walked in on you and Brian a few times,” Jeff said.

        “Oh, yeah,” Nick said.

        “Not the same,” Drew told Jeff.

        “Why not?” Jeff asked.

        “Brian and Nick finish whatever they were doing.”

        “You do?” Jeff asked.

        “Yeah,” Nick said, unconcerned.  “We go ahead and finish up.  The fellas understand.”

        “You don’t mind?  They don’t mind?” Jeff asked.

        “Mind what?” Nick asked.

        “Give up,” Drew said to Jeff.  “We will never understand their ways.”

        Nick shrugged.  “It’s just sex.  They’ve had sex.  They know we have sex.  When other people are around, it’s totally different.  We don’t let any outsiders, nobody but our closest security guys, see or hear anything.  But when it’s just the fellas, what, they don’t care.”

        “Sex is personal,” Jeff said.  “It’s private.”

        “Hey, Brian and I are professionals at keeping it hidden.  Our last two tours, there were rumors that we weren’t really together at all, because nobody on the tour ever caught us screwing.  Here with Drew it’s been more relaxed.  Brian’s actually better at hiding it than I am.”

        “I figured,” Jeff said.

        “But the fellas…  They know we’re screwing.  When the five of us live on top of each other on tour, either we have to stop it or they have to witness it.  We’re not stopping, so that means they have to deal with it.  And they’re good about it.  AJ flat out does not care what we do or when or where, as long as we’re not so loud we keep him awake when he’s trying to sleep.  Howie’s very discreet, and the second he walks in, he’s right back out acting like he never saw a thing.  Kevin’s okay as long as he doesn’t see any naked dick.”

        “And you don’t mind being walked in on?”

        “It ruins the flow if they interrupt us,” Nick said.  “But so what if they see my naked ass?  They’ve seen it before.”

        “Amazing,” Jeff said.

        “The views of one Carter Littrell Lachey do not reflect the views of all other Carter Littrell Lacheys,” Drew said.

        “Drew’s still shy about some things,” Nick told Jeff.  “I’m working on it.”

        “Good luck with that,” Jeff said.

        “What are you smiling about?” Justin asked Chris.

        “I was just remembering the time I hit AJ,” Chris said.  “What a lovely memory.”

        “I remember the first time I hit AJ,” Justin said.

        “Me, too,” JC said.

        “Me, too,” Lance said.

        “That sucks,” Joey said.  “I wish I’d hit AJ.”

        “It’s fun.  You should try it,” Chris said.

        “Everybody’s doing it,” Justin added.

        “I’d like to hit Kevin,” Lance said.

        “You’ve been violent enough lately,” JC said.

        “I’d like to hit Kevin,” Joey said.  “I hate AJ more, but Kevin...”

        “Kevin’s kind of pretty,” JC said.  “For a man.”

        “JC’s very pretty,” Justin said.  “And look who’s talking.”

        “What do you mean, look who’s talking?” JC asked.  “You look at who’s talking.”

        “Men shouldn’t be that pretty,” Joey said.

        “JC’s pretty,” Justin said.

        “JC doesn’t count,” Joey said.

        “Why not?” Justin asked.

        “Because JC’s…  Help,” Joey said.

        “JC’s flaming,” Chris said.  “JC has ‘G-A-Y’ in flashing purple and pink neon over his head.  He can be as pretty as he wants to be with his grand diva self.”

        “I am not flaming,” JC said.

        Lance snorted.

        “Justin’s pretty,” JC said.

        “Justin’s adorable,” Joey said.  “But he’s allowed to be, too.”

        “That cute baby boy routine was over when I hit eighteen,” Justin said.  “I’m no longer the certified pretty one.”

        “I think it lasted until you were twenty,” Lance said.

        “I thought I was the cute baby one,” Chris said, sounding hurt.

        “So gay guys can be pretty, but straight guys can’t?” Justin asked Joey.

        “Right,” Joey said.

        “Then it should be okay for Kevin to be pretty.”

        “Kevin’s not gay,” Joey said.

        “If one guy has sex with another guy, he’s gay,” Justin said.

        “Not necessarily,” Lance said.

        “Women have sex with other women and don’t identify themselves as lesbians,” Chris said.

        “Paying hustlers for blowjobs is one thing,” Justin said.  “Kevin and AJ had actual sex, more than once.  Not to mention Kevin’s supposed to be in love with him.”

        “Kevin is not in love with AJ,” Lance said.  “That’s bullshit.”

        “Lance is kind of pretty,” Chris said.  “No, Lance used to be kind of pretty.  What do we call this look?”

        “Hot,” Justin said.

        “You know who’s pretty?  Really pretty?  Howie’s pretty,” Chris said.

        “You’re obsessed, and it’s sick.  Howie’s not pretty,” Joey said.  “Now Brian, Brian’s pretty.”

        “Nick’s pretty,” JC said. “Nick is very pretty.”

        “Are you looking at other guys?” Justin asked JC.

        “You just said that Lance is hot,” JC said.

        “You think Lance is hot, too,” Justin said.

        Chris coughed.

        “Lance is very hot,” JC said.  “And Nick is very pretty.  And you,” he kissed Justin, “are hotter and prettier than everyone else combined.”

        “Gag,” Chris said.

        “I’d do Nick,” Lance said.

        “Thanks for volunteering way too much information,” Chris said.

        “You wouldn’t do Nick?” Lance asked.

        “There’s one major deterrent, besides the fact that my personal parts are committed to Howie for life,” Chris said.  “Nick’s personality.  I might do him if I could get him to shut up.”

        “That’s what ball gags are for,” Lance said.

        Justin choked on his pizza.  “Did you just say that?”

        “Guys,” JC said.  “Don’t talk about Nick like that.”

        “He’s pretty,” Lance said.  “He’s hot.  He’s a nice piece of ass to begin with, and Brian has him trained like a million-a-night whore.  I’d pay him to suck my dick.”

        “Lance,” JC said sharply.  “That is not funny.”

        “Who said I was joking?” Lance asked.

        “Lance,” Joey said.  “Don’t start.”

        “Carter may not be a whore, but I know he does it like one, and I’d pay for it,” Lance said.  “JC, you know better than I do that he’s giving it to more than just Brian and Drew.  98 Degrees’ tour must be having a great time with him visiting.”

        “Get out,” JC said, pointing to the door, his voice tense with anger.  “Get out of my room.”

        “You’re just jealous I’d pay more for Brian’s whore than I would for yours,” Lance snapped.

        “Maybe if you’d been half the whore I am AJ would have stayed with you instead of fucking everybody else,” Justin said.  “JC told you to get out.  Get out.”

        Lance stood.  “You will never be good enough,” he told Justin.

        “You were never in the running,” Justin snapped.  “Get the fuck out of our room.”

        Lance turned his back and left, slamming the door.

        “God, what an asshole,” Justin said.

        “Are you all right?” JC asked Justin, sliding an arm around his waist.

        “I’m fine,” Justin said.  “Lance can’t hurt me.  He has no leverage.”

        “I don’t like him saying those things to you,” JC said.  “And you know I don’t like you saying that about yourself.”

        “I know I’m not a whore, JC,” Justin said.  “He can have whatever perception of me he wants.  I’m just pissed he’s trying to talk shit about stuff he doesn’t know anything about.  He doesn’t have the first clue about Nick’s situation.”

        “Joey, are you okay?” Chris asked.

        Joey shook his head.  “No.  I don’t know.  I don’t know.”

        “Joey, I’m sorry,” Justin said.  “I wasn’t bitch-fighting Lance for fun.  You know I’ve put up with a lot from him lately.”

        “I know.  I don’t…  I don’t know what to do with him,” Joey said.  “You don’t know what he’s been through and what kind of pain he has inside.  You have someone who loves you and treats you like a god.  The person you love will never cheat on you and will never leave you.  If Lance tells you you’re not good enough, you have JC to negate the whole idea before it reaches your ears.  If you say that to Lance, who’s telling him it’s not true?”

        “He has you,” JC said.

        “That’s not the same,” Joey said.

        “Unconditional love is unconditional love, whether it’s paternal, fraternal, or romantic and sexual,” JC said.

        “Go check on him,” Justin said.

        “He needs to know that if he walks out, you’ll come after him,” JC said.  “Right now he’s alone.”

        Joey couldn’t let Lance feel alone.  He got to his feet.  “I’m sorry for what he said.”

        “Tell him I’m sorry,” Justin said.

        Joey left.

        Jeff was accepting beneath him, allowing his seduction, hands streaking heat over Nick’s body.

        Jeff was letting him.  It was time to make his move.  It was time to pull rank, time to let Jeff know his superiority, time to-

        Right, time to make an ass of himself and set up his own humiliation.  There was no way that this would ever work.  He didn’t even know what to say.

        He could do it.  Jeff wanted him to do it.  He knew Jeff wanted it.  He’d heard what Jeff had said to him in that locker room.

        “Jeff…”

        What was he doing?  Jeff would laugh him out of the bed.

        Jeff’s tongue ran over his lower lip, questioning.

        He tried again.  “Jeff.”  God, no, no, no.  What was he thinking?  He couldn’t pull rank on Jeff.  It was Jeff!  Jeff was smarter, stronger, more confident, more mature - - what was he supposed to say, “I have more solos than you, so suck my dick?”

        “What?” Jeff asked, hand on his back, eyes soft.  “What do you want?”

        “Nothing,” Nick said, and kissed him again.

        “Nick.  What is it?” Jeff asked.  “What do you want?”

        This was it.  The moment.  Jeff wanted it.  He wanted it.  His dick was rock-hard from the thought of it.  It would be simple.  All he had to say was…  Was…  Was…  “Nothing.”  Nick got up.  “Nothing.  I just remembered I was supposed to check with Deke about the…”  Nick pulled on clothes at random.  “I’ll be right back.”

        “Nick,” Jeff said.

        “Right back,” Nick repeated, and left.

        “You,” Drew said, rubbing his thigh against Nick’s balls.

        “Can I come on you?” Nick asked.

        Drew moaned, his hand restless over the head of Nick’s erection.  “Okay.”

        “You want it, don’t you?” Nick asked, kissing Drew’s neck, working his finger in and out, in and out.

        “Yes,” Drew said, moaning, screwing himself down on Nick’s finger.  His right hand was slicking precum up and down the shaft of Nick’s cock.

        “You want me to come on you, don’t you?” Nick asked, kissing Drew’s chest, licking at a nipple.

        “Yes, yes,” Drew said, letting go, twisting under him.

        “You’re a kinky nasty freak, aren’t you?” Nick asked, and licked Drew’s erection, feeling it harden and twitch under his tongue.

        “Yes, yes,” Drew said, groaning, responding to sound and touch and desire, not the actual words.  That meant that he was deep enough into it Nick could do anything and Drew would feel no shame, which was what Nick needed to be able to do this.

        Nick backed up, popping his finger out, sitting up between Drew’s legs.  Drew’s knees were bent on either side of him, and as soon as Nick was gone, Drew’s fingers immediately crept down into Drew’s groin, stroking his erection, fondling his balls.

        “Are you watching?” Nick asked, and wrapped his hand around his cock.

        Drew moaned, hips rising.  Yeah, he was watching.  His eyes were shiny with lust and his lips were parted and wet.

        “You want my dick, don’t you?” Nick asked.  “You want to suck on it?”

        Drew gave a small moan, hurting, wanting, his lips parting further as though to receive Nick’s cock.

        Nick pulled on his dick, watching the need rise in Drew’s eyes.  “You want me to fuck you with it?”

        Drew groaned, raising his hips, jacking himself.

        “Where do you want me to come on you?” Nick asked.  “On that hard muscular thigh?  On your pubes and your dick?”

        Drew was breathing heavily, fucking his own hand, close to coming.

        “Maybe I should come on your ass, like you came on mine.”

        Drew started to make urgent sounds in the back of his throat, staring as Nick’s hand worked over Nick’s dick.

        “You want me to come on your pretty mouth and across those nice cheekbones?” Nick asked.

        Drew cried out, thighs wide, muscles flexing, coming in white spurts over his abdomen and chest.  He shivered, hand relaxing, still breathing too hard.

        Nick leaned in closer, fisting his dick.  Drew panted for it, but held still.  “I know how bad you want my dick,” Nick said.  “I know how bad you want my cum.”

        Drew whimpered, begging, undulating before Nick’s body.

        “It’s coming,” Nick said.  His balls were more than ready.  He couldn’t hold it back.  He pulled on his dick and there it was, hot thick streams of it, all across Drew’s chest.  Drew arched, twisting, shuddering, moaning with satisfaction, panting eagerly for more.  Nick milked his dick dry, leaving white splashes of cum up Drew’s torso.  When he couldn’t come anymore, he waited until Drew had lapsed into stillness, listening to Drew’s quick stunned panting, watching Drew’s fingers clutch the bedclothes.

        Nick slid into position and licked salty jism off Drew’s hip.  Drew gasped, shocked, and Nick’s tongue fucked into Drew’s navel.  He lapped up cum from Drew’s abs, sucked it off Drew’s ribcage, licked it from Drew’s nipples.  Drew’s hands started rubbing over his shoulders, caressing his upper arms, eager to touch him after being kept at bay for those short minutes.  By the time Nick got to Drew’s collarbone, Drew was hard again and begging to be kissed.  He gave in and kissed Drew, wrapping his arm around Drew’s waist to lift Drew’s hips, rocking his dick against Drew’s just to enjoy the whimpering sound Drew made.

        “Do you want to suck on it before I fuck you with it?” Nick asked.

        “Uh, uh, uh,” Drew panted, sounding dangerously close to coming again.

        “Do you want me to suck yours first?” Nick asked, high from the wicked slide of dick against dick.

        “Oh, ah, ah…”  Drew turned his head to the side, squeezing his eyes shut.  That meant it was too much to bear.  Nick sucked on the tendon running up the side of Drew’s neck, inserting his long middle finger inside Drew’s constricting heat.  Drew groaned, and Nick thrust against his hip, knowing that at any second Drew would-

        -knock on the door.

        Nick ignored it, wanting to make Drew come, wanting to make Drew-

        -knock on the door.

        Nick raised his head, falling still.  Something flickered in the back of his mind.  He began to loosen his hold on Drew, feeling pulled away, feeling a sudden compulsion to-

        “Get the door,” Drew whispered.  He licked his lips and found his voice.  “Get the door.”

        Nick felt Drew’s urgency.  He got up, taking the comforter from the bed.  Drew was right behind him, wrapped in a sheet.  Nick fumbled the lock and yanked open the door.

        Brian smiled.