banner by Vanessa
Copyright June 19-July 8, 2004 by Matthew Haldeman-Time
Rating: soft R?
Pairing: Nick Lachey/Jeff Timmons
Disclaimer: The young men who comprise 98 Degrees are their own people. The author has not met anyone here described, nor does the author mean to suggest that these people act this way in real life. This writing is a work of fiction. I make no money from this venture.
Dedication: This slashfic is for Jeff, and for the real-life kitchen critter who inspired this story.
“I noticed I’m doing most of the work, anyway,” Nick said. “Hand me that screwdriver.”
Jeff handed it over. “Next time, give me the cash.”
“What makes you think that your ingratitude this year is going to get me to give you anything next year?” Nick asked.
“It’s just this funny feeling I have,” Jeff said. “I also have this other funny feeling that says you don’t have a clue what you’re doing. Why didn’t you bring Drew?”
“He’s busy,” Nick said. “I know what I’m doing.”
Jeff resisted the urge to make several smart remarks. “I’m getting lunch. You want something to eat?”
“Yeah.”
Jeff left Nick there and went to the kitchen, stepping neatly around Petunia. He wondered how long it would take before Nick screwed together the wrong two boards. He wondered why Nick kept trying to buy his affection. He wondered how many birthdays were going to pass before Nick would grab life by the balls and kiss him already.
Last year, after Nick bought him an entire home gym - - like he didn’t already have one, and yeah, this new one was even better, but still, he knew how much that shit cost - - he’d promised himself that if Nick hadn’t made a move by his next birthday, he’d make the move himself.
In August, it had seemed like Nick was on the verge; and at Christmas, there had definitely been a serious moment there under Justin’s fake mistletoe. But Nick had chickened out, just like he’d been doing ever since they’d met.
Jeff was tired of it. He was only getting hotter, but he wasn’t getting any younger, and if he wanted to spend the best years of his life with Nick, he had to get this thing started. He’d been waiting for Nick to start things, because that would be better for Nick’s ego, but he couldn’t wait forever.
It was time to do something.
“Shit!” Nick yelled. “Ouch!”
Jeff snorted, opening the refrigerator.
Nick came into the kitchen. “Where’s your hammer?”
“I thought you said that everything you needed for assembly came in the boxes,” Jeff said.
“I need a hammer,” Nick said. “What’s that?”
“What?” Jeff turned to see Nick staring down at the clear plastic dish turned upside-down on the floor. “A bowl.”
“I meant the cockroach under the bowl,” Nick said.
“That’s Petunia,” Jeff said. He closed the refrigerator door, sensing that this conversation would take some time.
Nick’s stare shifted from the floor to Jeff. “What?”
“Petunia,” Jeff said. “I trapped her under there yesterday.”
“You trapped a cockroach, and you named it Petunia,” Nick said. “I don’t think we should be friends anymore.”
“I’m not saying I know it’s a girl,” Jeff said. “It could be male. And it’s not a cockroach, it’s a wood roach.”
“It’s a cockroach,” Nick said. “Why didn’t you kill it?”
“It’ll die where it is,” Jeff said.
“It’ll die sooner if you kill it,” Nick said. “All you have to do is step on it.”
“I had bare feet,” Jeff said.
Nick was staring at him again. “You’re afraid of it.”
“No, I’m not,” Jeff said.
“You’re afraid of it,” Nick said. “You’re afraid of a bug?”
Jeff crossed his arms over his chest defensively. “I’m not afraid of it.”
“You’re scared of little old Petunia?” Nick asked, grinning.
“Shut up,” Jeff said.
“You can benchpress a car, and you’re afraid of Petunia?”
“Shut up,” Jeff said. “If you’re such a man, you kill her.”
“Okay.” Nick looked down again, studying her through the clear plastic. “With what?”
“You told me to step on her,” Jeff said.
“She’s kind of big.”
“So step hard.”
Nick studied the situation. “You pull the bowl off, and I’ll step on her.”
Jeff didn’t want to get that close, but he wasn’t going to admit that to Nick. “Okay. You ready?”
Nick stepped back in preparation. “Go for it.”
Jeff wiped his hands on his jeans, then took a few steps closer. He leaned down slowly, eyeing Petunia. She wasn’t moving. Maybe she was already dead. He put his hand on the bowl. He didn’t want to do this.
Nick lifted his foot.
Jeff steadied his grip. “One, two, three!” He snatched the bowl away.
Petunia ran straight at him.
Jeff jerked back, falling on his ass, scrambling to his feet, trying not to scream, mentally screaming in protest. The second he got his balance, he tried to launch himself across the room, in the opposite direction of Petunia, but Nick was in his way.
“There!” Nick said, pointing across the room. Jeff was tempted to climb onto the tabletop and let Nick handle Petunia, but if he did, he’d never hear the end of it, and he didn’t need Nick to make jokes at his expense about this for the rest of his life. He turned to see Petunia scuttling towards the hallway. Suddenly, over Jeff’s shoulder, Nick threw an orange right at her.
“What the hell are you doing?” Jeff demanded, turning to Nick.
“Whoa, here she comes,” Nick said, backing up.
“What?” Jeff turned; Petunia was coming right at him. “Whoa!” Jokes at his expense or not, Jeff wasn’t about to let that thing crawl up his pantleg. He grabbed back at Nick, to push Nick in front of him, but Nick was trying to escape. Jeff simultaneously pulled on Nick and tried to step onto a chair, but Nick was jerking away, to get out of Petunia’s direct path, and Jeff lost his balance, gripping Nick to stay upright. In one split second, Petunia ran past his bare feet, and he made a severely unmasculine noise, and Nick shouted and leapt away, and Jeff started going down again; and this time, he took Nick down with him. He hit the floor with a thud, Nick right on top of him, and Jeff’s first thought was, where the hell was that roach?! He started squirming and Nick started rolling and for some reason, the idiot decided to take him along. They rolled left, Nick grabbing the bowl Jeff had dropped, then rolled right, Nick’s hand reaching over Jeff’s head, and then Nick slammed the bowl down and they stopped.
Jeff turned his head. There, right above his head, under Nick’s hand, was the bowl, upside-down. Inside the bowl was Petunia.
Jeff breathed a slow sigh of relief.
Nick lifted his hand.
Jeff looked at Nick. “Thanks.”
“No problem.”
“You know, we’re starting out right where we began,” Jeff said.
“Not…exactly,” Nick said.
Jeff had been talking about the roach-on-the-kitchen-floor situation. Nick wasn’t. Jeff could tell, both by the “I want you naked” look in Nick’s eyes and the way Nick’s hand was sliding up his ribcage under his shirt.
Technically, that counted as Nick making the first move. Jeff wasn’t going to wait for Nick to make the second move, because Nick kept taking too long. He wrapped one hand around Nick’s nape and pulled Nick down for a kiss.
Nick made a surprised sound, then a protesting sound, then a hell yeah sound, and settled into it. Nick’s mouth was everything Jeff had been dreaming about, soft and lush and perfect. Jeff opened for Nick’s tongue with a low moan, sliding his hand up into Nick’s hair.
For a few minutes, everything was a slow-motion blur of hotly arousing sensations. Escalating heat, pounding heart, Nick’s hands warm and firm on his body, Nick’s kiss experienced and wet, Nick’s body hard and heavy on his, Nick’s dick stiffening against his thigh. Jeff licked against Nick’s tongue, scritching his fingers through Nick’s hair, sliding his other hand down to the curves of Nick’s firm ass. Nick’s hips rocked subtly against his, and he was starting to get really hard, and he had to weigh the risks of breaking the moment to move to the bedroom versus making out on his kitchen floor.
On his kitchen floor, about a foot away from Petunia.
“Nick,” Jeff said, turning his head aside. “Nick.”
Nick just started kissing his neck instead of his mouth. Which felt, oh, great, wow, nice, ah… Jeff winced with pleasure at the gentle sting of Nick’s teeth, pushing his knee up between Nick’s thighs, opening his eyes to - - damn. Petunia. “Nick. Nick, can we do this in my bedroom?”
Nick made an undecipherable noise against Jeff’s collarbone, licking up towards his voicebox.
“God,” Jeff moaned. “Nick, wait, wait, there’s, this is one fucking ugly bug and it’s freaking me out and seriously, this is great, but I have to get up right now.”
Nick raised his head and met Jeff’s eyes. His skin was flushed, his eyes bright, his lips kiss-swollen, his voice suspicious. “Is this an excuse to get me off of you?”
“No, you can stay on me, just not here,” Jeff said. “Believe me, I want this, I’m happy about this, I just have this serious urge to get off this floor and take a shower and change my clothes and make sure nothing’s crawling on me.”
“Nothing’s crawling on you,” Nick said, but he got up, and held down a hand to Jeff.
Jeff grasped Nick’s hand and pulled himself to his feet. He let go and started to brush himself off. “We can get back to that thing we were doing in a second, I just-”
“You’re afraid of that little bug?” Nick asked.
“It’s not little,” Jeff said, giving Nick a don’t-give-me-grief look.
“Do you want me to pat you down?” Nick offered, running his fingertips along Jeff’s shirt collar. “I can do a pretty thorough investigation.”
“What was that, a proposition?” Jeff asked.
Nick dropped his hand and glared at Jeff. “Forget it.”
“No, it was nice,” Jeff said, smiling at Nick to pacify him. “Come on, go ahead,” he offered, wrapping an arm around Nick’s neck. “Investigate me,” he murmured, and kissed Nick’s generous mouth.
Nick’s arm came around his waist, keeping him close. “I can’t believe you’re afraid of a little bug.”
Jeff would have pulled away at that comment, since it was completely unwarranted and ruining the mood, but he loved the way Nick kissed, so he stayed put. “Don’t be rude,” he said. “It took that little bug to get you to make your move.”
“Make my move?” Nick repeated. “What do you think I’ve been doing? Do you think I’m here putting together that damned entertainment center for the fun of it?”
Jeff smiled into Nick’s eyes. “Yes.”
Nick grinned a little. “Yeah, but I’m also making my move. I’ve been making my move for months now. You’re so slow on the uptake, I had to get on top of you and pin you down to get you to kiss me.”
“When was I supposed to kiss you?” Jeff asked. This was brand-new information.
“Under the mistletoe! I couldn’t have been more obvious about it! I thought I was going to have to hit you over the head with a brick!”
“That was four months ago!”
“So?”
“So you could have something since then!”
“I have!” Nick looked irritated. “I’ve been inviting you out and hanging out here and giving you things and - - Justin keeps asking if we’re dating!”
Nick was making a good point. Jeff rubbed his thumb over Nick’s nape and thought about that.
“We go to all of the games together, I keep taking you out to dinner, I gave you that necklace for Valentine’s Day-”
“That was Valentine’s Day?”
Nick looked at him like he was an idiot.
Jeff grinned. Maybe he was an idiot, but he was a happy idiot. “You gave me a necklace for Valentine’s Day?”
“It wasn’t an official Valentine’s gift,” Nick said, shifting uneasily within his embrace. “It just happened to be Valentine’s Day when I gave it to you.”
Jeff kissed him, long and slow. “Thank you for my birthday present.”
“You’re welcome,” Nick said breathlessly, and kissed him again. “Which one?”
Jeff loved Nick’s mouth.
“The one where you’re about to be naked on my bed. Come on.”