Copyright September 14-October 1, 2000 by Matthew Haldeman-Time (actually, 3:30 a.m. October 2)

Rating: NC-17 for graphic male-male sex

Disclaimer: The young men who comprise 98 Degrees, the Backstreet Boys, and *NSYNC are their own people.  The author has not met anyone here described, nor does the author mean to suggest that these people act this way in real life.  This writing is a work of fiction.  I make no money from this venture.

Dedication: This slashfic is for Ewan McGregor and the Savage Garden slashers.

Notice: This piece follows "I Need You Tonight," its sister fic "Boy Lead the Way to Ecstasy," and the sequel to both, "Not Easy."

        "Just the man I was looking for," AJ said when Jeff rounded the corner to the elevator.

        "Looking for for what?" Jeff asked, curious.

        "Since this is your honeymoon, I shouldn't distract you from your duties," AJ said, "but might you spare me just five minutes of conversation?"

        "Can we walk and talk at the same time?"

        "I don't think that you'll want anyone overhearing this conversation."

        "Really.  You want to talk in my...Nick's sleeping...your room?"

        "I didn't learn it anywhere," Brian said.  "It's what I feel when I look into your eyes.  When I look into Drew's eyes.  I just looked and told him what I saw."

        "You look into my eyes and see that?" Drew asked.

        "So much more," Brian said, and kissed him.  "I want you to make love to me tonight."

        "Yes yes yes," Nick said.  "What time?  I'll mark my calendar.  I wouldn't miss this for the world."

        "Are you sure?" Drew asked Brian.

        "Yes," Brian said, kissing him again.

        "You?" Jeff asked, sitting beside him sideways, frowning.

        "Nobody knows.  Well, one person knows," AJ allowed.  "I think he figured it out when he kissed me and instead of shoving him off and calling the cops I sucked his tongue right out of his mouth."

        "If no one knows, why are you telling me?" Jeff asked.  "Not that I don't appreciate the confidence."

        "If I trust you with one of my secrets, maybe you can trust me with one of yours."

        "My secrets?" Jeff asked.

        "Have you ever had a fantasy?  Giving an acceptance speech at the Grammys?  Meeting Michael Jackson?  Touching your new brother-in-law with more than brotherly love?"

        Jeff tensed to rise.

        "It's strange, sometimes," AJ said, looking at him, gaze pinning him in place on the sofa.  "Sometimes people can spend their lives wanting something and not realize that it wanted them right back.  And all of that time they wasted agonizing over not getting it or not deserving it or not being fated to have it, they could have spent just having it, doing it, and moving on to other things."

        Jeff's jaw tightened and his eyes darkened.

        "Drew trusts Brian.  And Nick.  I'm sure that he tells them things he would never, ever, admit to anyone else.  I'm sure that if he told Nick and Brian his deepest, darkest fantasies, that they'd do whatever they could to make his fantasies come true.  Because they're in love with him, and they want him to be happy, and they know that whatever happens will only bring them closer," AJ looked hard at Jeff, "and will not, would never, in any way, threaten what they share."

        "If Drew would ever tell anyone his secrets, he wouldn't want them to go any farther than that person," Jeff said.

        "He knows that he can trust Nick and Brian," AJ said.  "They're good people.  They're my friends, my brothers, and they trust me.  I like Drew.  He gives them something I never even knew they were missing.  If they asked me to do something a little out of the ordinary for them, I would."

        "For instance?"

        "For instance, I'd walk up to someone who could probably kick my butt and ask him if he wants to swap spit with his brother-in-law, bandmate, and close friend.  And then, I'd ask him if his husband might like to do the same."

        Jeff had not been expecting that.  The first half, maybe, somewhere, but the second half, never.

        "You know your husband better than anyone," AJ said.  "And you know yourself.  And you know Drew."  AJ looked down at his hands, then back to Jeff.  "Whatever happens is between you, Nick, and Drew.  And Nick and Brian.  I have nothing to do with it.  No one else ever needs to know anything.  If you want to give me your answer, you may.  If you'd like to talk to Brian, you may.  If you want to scream at me, hit me, and kick Drew out of 98 Degrees, that's up to you."

        "He doesn't know."

        "That we're talking?  He has no idea whatsoever.  No one tells Drew anything until the other four of you have decided everything.  Brian has two conditions, and not hurting Drew is one of them."

        "What's the other?"

        "No matter what's decided, you understand from the start, right now, that, how can I put this delicately?  Nothing, nothing goes inside of Drew below the waist.  Off-limits."

        Jeff nodded.

        "You need some time?"

        "I need some therapy."  Jeff left.

        AJ raised his eyebrows.  "Interesting."  And that was the last word that AJ McLean ever said on the subject.

        JC glanced at him briefly, fingers stopping on the keys.  "Hi."

        "So.  Gonna stay with me forever?"

        JC's fingers dropped slowly from the keys to his lap.  "No."

        Justin made an error sound.  "Wrong answer!"

        "I told you, I can't."

        "For my own good."

        "Yes."

        "I think we're missing something here," Justin said.  "Besides an ounce of common sense between us.  'Cause you know we'll never get that.  But we're - - you're," he stressed, "looking at it wrong.  You don't love me any more than I love you.  I don't love you any less than you love me.  We just love differently.  You need ever so much to be with me.  And I need ever so much for you to be with me.  We both want the same thing.  Yours is just an outward kind of thing and mine is a selfish greedy one."

        "You're not selfish or greedy."

        "But I need you.  You know that I need you.  I think I've made it pretty clear.  Or weren't you paying attention all year?"

        "You need love and affection and sex.  Someone else can give that to you."

        "Who?  Just name me somebody."

        "Justin-"

        "No one can give me what you give me.  I don't need anyone like I need you.  I don't need sex.  I need you to make love to me.  I don't need affection.  I need for you to touch me and tell me you love me.  I don't need love.  I need for you to love me."

        "I do love you," JC said, and he was weak, he couldn't help himself, he touched the soft skin behind Justin's ear.  Justin turned toward his touch and it was such a simple thing to kiss those soft lips.

        "No one else can love me like you love me," Justin whispered, and Justin's mouth opened for him.

        "What?  Yeah," Jeff said.  "Just thinking."

        "You had to get up and get dressed to think?"

        "I...  Actually, I went to get food, but I never got that far."

        "You okay?" he tried again.

        "Yeah.  You trust me."

        "Always."

        "Good."

        "Why am I not liking the sound of this?"

        "It's okay."  Jeff kissed him.  "I'm going to go get food.  For real this time.  Go back to sleep."

        "Jeff."  He caught Jeff's hand and pulled Jeff closer.  "Talk to me."

        "People keep secrets.  Sometimes out of guilt.  Sometimes to protect other people."

        "You don't have to protect me."

        "Have you ever kept yourself from wanting something because you knew that you could never have it?"

        Nick frowned.  "I don't know.  Probably.  What?"

        "Go back to sleep."  Jeff kissed him again and left.  He rolled onto his stomach and frowned at the headboard.  Had he ever kept himself from wanting something because he knew that he couldn't have it?  Not really.  That was what dreams and goals were for, wanting something out of reach and striving for it, even something you knew you'd never get.  Because sometimes you could get closer, at least.

        He'd known for sure he'd never get Jeff, and look where he was now.  He'd been sure that Jeff was off-limits.  They worked together, they were best friends, practically brothers, and Jeff was straight, and he knew that he'd never in a million years get to be with Jeff, even for one night, even for one kiss, but then...and now...

        He'd never wanted to be with anyone like that, not with everything he had.  He'd wanted people before, or thought he did.  (It was probably no coincidence that he'd dated Jessica, who'd made it clear that she wanted to stay a virgin until marriage.)  But usually, except for those first years of Jeff, he'd never really wanted someone he couldn't have.

        - silky skin - hard muscle - trusting eyes - wide curved mouth - strong sure hands - pure heart -

        He rolled to his side and pulled up the covers.  He wondered what was wrong with Jeff.  Something was going on, clearly.  But he trusted Jeff.  That was part of their relationship.  He'd just have to wait for Jeff to tell him.  Or talk Jeff into telling him.  Jeff had seemed to want to tell him something, at least, so that was encouraging.  It couldn't be too bad.

        "If we can't see him, he won't know we're here?" Drew asked.

        "Right.  Sshhh.  We're invisible."  Drew kissed him.

        Brian ran his hands over his hair and checked the peephole.  Jeff.  Uh-oh.  He grabbed the key and opened the door, stepping into the hallway and pulling the door almost shut.

        "AJ talked to me."

        This was either going to be really really really bad, or worse.

        "Can we talk somewhere?"

        "Yeah.  Hold on."  He slipped back into the room and closed the door.  He went to the bed and took a breath for courage, tugging the covers down again.  "Guys.  Hey."

        "What?" Nick asked, looking up from a kiss.

        "I need to go for a minute."

        "Go where?" Drew asked.  "Who is it?"

        He thought fast.  "Liam Neeson."  Nick smiled, knowing that he was unconsciously using the same excuse that Nick had given for his earlier absence.  Nick decided that they must be spending way too much time together.

        "What?" Drew asked.

        "So I gotta go," Brian said.  "But I'll be back.  Later.  Soon.  Maybe.  Don't, you know..."

        "Do anything I'd do?" Nick suggested.

        "Right.  Don't do anything Nick would do.  I'll...bye."

        "Brian, where are you going and why?" Drew asked.

        "I won't leave the building or anything," Brian said.  "Except maybe on a stretcher.  Gotta go."  He left quickly.  Closing the door, he nodded to Jeff and went to 303, as yet unused.  He entered, turned the deadbolt, and turned on the light.  They faced each other in the entryway.  "You haven't killed me yet."

        "Do you need to hear all of my reasons and justifications?" Jeff asked.

        "No.  That's private."

        Jeff nodded.  "What do you want?  In literal, physical terms?"

        "I want Drew to have a chance to be with you.  And with his brother.  Just kissing, or making love - - but nothing goes in him except in his mouth."

        Jeff nodded.

        "I'd like you to be with him first, then Nick, not all three of you at once, but that's not up to me."

        "You and Nick will be there?"

        "No."

        "You could be."  Brian shook his head.  "This is for one time only," Jeff said, to be clear.

        "Yes."

        "I haven't mentioned it to Nick," Jeff said.  "I wanted to talk to you first.  Drew doesn't know?"

        "Drew won't know anything until Nick's agreed to it.  I don't want him hurt."

        "Neither do I.  When?"

        "Tomorrow night.  In here."  Neutral territory.

        "I want to make sure that this - - it will change things, it has to, we can't do something like this and have everything stay the same.  But only changes for the better.  No one gets hurt."

        "Especially not Drew," Brian said.

        "I'll talk to Nick.  Tomorrow morning, nine o'clock, you and I meet here."

        "I'll bring Nick."

        "With any luck, so will I."  They shook hands.

        "Why not?" AJ asked.

        Chris and Lance looked at each other.

        "I'm going," AJ said.

        "Justin's down there," Lance said.

        "Justin Timberlake Chasez," Chris said.

        "With JC," Lance said.

        "They're having a fight?" AJ asked.

        "They seem to be making up," Chris said.  He coughed.  "On the piano."

        "On the..."  AJ grinned.  "On the piano.  You're kidding."

        "They're not...  It's not like that," Lance said.

        "We're giving them some privacy," Chris said.

        "On the piano," AJ said.  "Maybe I should warn Kevin."

        "They're not..."  Lance was turning red.  "It's not like that."

        "It sort of is," Chris disagreed.

        "Okay, sort of," Lance admitted, "but it's not like that."

        "Not...entirely," Chris said.  They heard Justin's voice cry out down the hallway.  "But it sort of is."

        "Take me to bed," Justin said.  "Take me...JC...we can't...here..."

        "Oh god.  Justin," JC moaned.

        "I missed you so much...I want this so much...I...JC..."  Justin moaned, pelvis lifting toward the sweet friction.

        "Love you.  Want you."

        "Love you.  Need you."  Justin's head fell back, fingers digging into JC's shoulders.  "Don't...JC...please...not..."

        "I love you like this," JC said, rocking closer, tighter, closer, tighter.  The keys played their music as Justin moved in response.  Justin panted, open-mouthed, clutching spasmodically at JC, trying to get JC's hips to thrust harder against his, ass muscles clenching tightly around JC's fingers.

        "JC," Justin said, voice coming out much shakier than intended, "god, JC, J...we...not..."  He came with a sharp cry.  "JC," he said, gasping.

        JC's hand worked its way out from the back of Justin's pants.  He wrapped his arms around Justin, just standing there, erection aching in the confines of his jeans but happy to be near Justin's body, hands sliding in comforting patterns up and down Justin's back, eyes closing.  "Love you, baby."

        "You couldn't prove it in a bed?" Justin muttered without anger.

        JC's hands slid down to Justin's butt and he pulled Justin off of the keyboard.  "I can now, if you want."

        "So good to me," Justin murmured.  "Hey."

        "What?"

        Justin looked into his eyes and smiled.  "Last time we made out at a piano, you came in your pants.  I guess it was my turn."

        "Does that mean you're going to blow me?" JC asked.

        "That means you're going to take me to bed to make love to me like civilized people."

        "Justin, when I make love to you, you are many things, but civilized is not one of them."

        "Right.  You usually tell me I'm...beautiful, hot, pretty, so good, so fucking good, tight, so tight, so hot, sweet, so sweet, what else?"

        "Beautiful.  It's worth saying twice."

        "Right."  Justin kissed him, arms around him, one hand coming to his nape, drawing on his tongue.  "Upstairs."

        "Upstairs," JC agreed, and continued the kiss.  A minute passed before JC was lifting Justin onto the piano again.

        "Oh...god...JC," Justin moaned, sinking back, legs spreading.

        "We're standing here listening why?" AJ asked.

        "Someone has to stand guard," Lance said.

        "And it takes four of us why?" AJ asked.

        "You're free to leave," Chris said.

        AJ, who was learning a lot today about relationships and sex and love and human behavior, decided that maybe he'd had enough.  He left.  A few minutes later, he opened his room door to admit someone familiar.  "How did I know you'd be here?"

        "I want to make you sound like that."

        AJ was pressed against the closed door, mouth licked, torso groped.  "That's a start," he said.  "Easy there, space cowboy."

        "That's not funny."

        "It's not a good song, either."

        "You want to know what I think of your music?"

        "Tell me later."  He moved in for another kiss.

        "How's Liam?" Nick asked.

        "He had good news."

        Nick's smile was incredible.  "Really?"

        "Don't get overexcited."

        Nick couldn't stop smiling anyway.  "What'd he say?"

        "I'm meeting him again tomorrow.  You can come with me and hear for yourself."

        "Can I come?" Drew asked.

        "Sorry.  Private official Jedi business," Brian said.

        "Should I be worried?" Drew asked.

        "No," Nick said, trying to temper his smile but failing.

        "Don't worry about it," Brian said.  "We're fighting for the light side.  Come on, we need food."

        "Then what?" Nick asked.

        "Then Drew can make love to me for the next, say, ten hours?"

        "Good!"  Nick bounced from the bed.  "Food, sex, sex, sex, sex, food, sex, sex, sex.  My best week ever."

        "What's wrong?"

        He looked toward the bed.  "You're supposed to be sleeping."

        "I'm not."  Nick decided to forget modesty and left the bed, coming over to sit in front of Jeff.  "What's wrong?"

        Jeff smiled.  "What makes you think that anything's wrong?"

        Nick couldn't help but smile back.  "Besides that you came in and sat on the floor looking like the weight of the world was on your shoulders?"

        "Yeah.  Besides that."

        "You forgot the food again."

        "I..."  Jeff groaned.  "I am losing my mind.  No, no," he said, sitting up straighter, looking intently at Nick, "I'm not.  I'm doing the right thing.  I'm doing the right thing.  Tell me I'm doing the right thing."

        "You're doing the right thing," Nick said.

        "You're right.  I am."

        "Jeff?  I believe that you are doing the right thing, but could you tell me what the right thing is?"

        "There are different kinds of love."

        "Sure."

        "You love me in a different way from your mother, and you love Justin in a different way from Drew."

        "Right."

        "So you could tell Cate that you love her, and tell Justin that you love him, and mean something different."

        "Right."

        "And you could make love with me, and make love with Drew, and-"

        "What?"

        Jeff swallowed and closed Nick's mouth.

        Nick pulled back, shaking his head.  "What?"

        "I know you love him."

        "Of course I love him, he's my brother."

        "And your bandmate.  And one of your best friends."

        "So?"

        "You're very close to him."

        "Not that close!"

        "Don't you want to be?"

        "No!"

        "Nick."

        "Shut up, Jeff."

        "Okay.  Okay," Jeff said without judgment, holding up his hands calmly to show his defenselessness.  "I'll go get something to eat."  Nick was angry.  Nick was very angry.  Jeff left quietly.  Oh boy.  He breathed carefully as he went to the stairs.  This was going to be easier than he'd expected.

        Nick forced himself up from the floor and dressed quickly.  He didn't like feeling naked, vulnerable.  He needed something to protect him, something to protect him from - -

        From what?  From Jeff?

        From Jeff.  Jeff saw too much.  Jeff knew him too well.

        But he couldn't protect himself, not from Jeff, not anymore.  Jeff was inside already, too deep, too far, too late.  Inside, poking around, flipping through his darkest secrets.  No, he didn't want to protect himself from Jeff, didn't need to, because he was safe with Jeff, his secrets were safe with Jeff.  He could trust Jeff.  Jeff didn't take these things lightly.  Jeff didn't play games.  Not when it counted.  Jeff knew what he needed.

        When he'd first heard Jeff say those words, "I'm gay," he'd felt his entire world falling, falling, he was falling, and then he was kissing Jeff, pushing his tongue into Jeff, pushing himself into Jeff, and Jeff let him.  Jeff let him get it all out, all of his love, all of his lust.  Only when he'd cleansed himself in Jeff, only when he'd realized and accepted what had happened, when he was ready, that was when Jeff said, "I love you, Nick."  Jeff knew to wait, knew to let him go, knew when he was ready to hear it.

        Jeff knew when to tease him, when to take control, when he needed control.  Knew when to love him and when to push him and when he needed a warm heart.  Jeff even knew when to argue with him.

        He could trust Jeff.  He had so far, and he should now.

        But what was Jeff saying?  What was Jeff...  Jeff knew.  Jeff knew what he couldn't admit to himself.  He didn't dare, just thinking about it, there were some things he couldn't go near, couldn't imagine.  Because if he did imagine it, if he let himself think of it on any level even for one long second...bad things would happen.  God would strike him down or he'd be disowned or he'd be kicked out of 98 Degrees or Jeff would leave him or Drew would hate him and he couldn't, couldn't take it if any of that happened.

        Jeff was taking the idea of it very well.  Alarmingly well.  No one else would take it that well.  He wasn't taking it well at all.  And Drew, Drew would - - Drew would never speak to him again, never look at him.  He wasn't sure he could look at Drew right now, either.

        Drew was his little brother.  Three years younger, four inches shorter.  The one he'd brought to 98 Degrees without a second thought.  The one who let him stand in the limelight.  The one who smiled and who teased and who really, he suspected, had it a lot more together than he did.  How could he look into those trusting hazel eyes and-

        No.  Never.  He wouldn't do that to Drew.  Drew believed in him.  For some miraculous reason, Jeff didn't hate him, and he thanked God for that, but Drew would hate him, and he couldn't live with that.

        When Jeff returned, they ate in silence on the floor.  He wasn't sure what it was later.  Then Jeff set their trays in the hallway and knelt in front of him and kissed his mouth.

        "It's all right to love him," Jeff said.  "I love him."

        "Yeah, but you don't..."  Nick looked into Jeff's eyes.  Jeff smiled, just a little.  "You want to..."  Jeff's eyebrows went up a little.  "Drew?"  Jeff's smile increased a fraction.  "You and..."

        "It's not the same for me as it is for you," Jeff said.

        "He's not your brother," Nick muttered, lowering his eyes again.

        "It's important to me that you understand," Jeff said, lifting Nick's chin.  "Nick.  Look at me.  Listen to me."  Nick met his eyes.  "Don't give me the stubborn face.  Drew pulls it off much better than you do."

        Nick smiled despite himself.  "He does."

        "We're lucky he doesn't use it often.  Now listen to me.  Drew is not my brother.  My love for him is different from your love for him.  My love for him is different from my love for you.  You know about my love for you.  How deep it runs, how strong it is.  Nothing shakes that.  Nothing changes that.  I do love Drew.  I'm not in love with him."

        "Don't..."

        "I won't make you talk about it.  You don't have to explain yourself to me."  Nick had a feeling that Jeff understood him anyway.  "Brian talked to me."  Nick started to pull away; Jeff gripped his hand.  "Drew wants what we want.  Brian wants to give him the chance.  Just between the three of us.  You and me and Drew.  Drew doesn't even know that Brian talked to me."

        Nick shook his head.

        "What you're feeling for Drew, on every level, in your heart and in your mind and in your body, yes, Nick, he feels it too.  He loves you, you know he loves you."

        Nick put his hand over Jeff's mouth just to keep Jeff from saying anything else.  He dropped his hand, struggling through his thoughts, trying to hold onto something.  Something that made sense to him.  Anything.  "Drew wants to make love to you."

        Jeff's eyes went wide.

        "Isn't that what you said?"  Had he misunderstood everything?  Had Jeff meant something entirely different and-

        "I never...  I've been so worried about you I didn't even..."

        Nick had to smile.

        "Oh, Nick, now you have to say yes, you have to, I...  Just for one chance to kiss him.  One chance, one night.  To feel him for myself."  Jeff took Nick's hands in his.  "Brian wants to meet us tomorrow morning.  With Nick.  To talk about it.  If we all come to an understanding, and if Drew agrees, then it'll be tomorrow night.  Drew doesn't know about any of it, so if you say no, he won't be hurt."

        "Understanding," Nick repeated.

        "Brian laid some ground rules.  Two.  Right from the start."

        "What are they?"

        "Drew doesn't get hurt.  We can all agree to that."

        "And?"

        "We can't actually...fuck him.  With anything.  I think that he's still a virgin.  I think that it's a good rule, and I think that it goes for you and me, too."

        "But...I...you..."

        "But you can do anything else with him," Jeff agreed softly.  "You can touch him.  You can kiss him.  You can make love with him in every other way."

        -skinlikesilk-curveofmuscle-curveoflip-

        "No.  He's my brother."

        "I know."  Jeff squeezed Nick's hands.  "We'll talk to Nick and Brian tomorrow morning."

        "What did he say to them?"

        "I don't know.  We can ask.  I trust Brian.  Especially with Drew.  It'll be okay."

        Nick wrapped his arms around Jeff, held Jeff close, pressing his face into Jeff's strong shoulder.  Felt like Jeff, smelled like Jeff, breathed like Jeff.  Jeff was solid, and here, and Jeff was saying these things.  If they were coming from Jeff, they must mean, must be, there had to be something there.  Something real.  He made himself say some of it, just parts, out loud, forced himself to speak at least some of it.  To hear it from himself.  "You want to make love with Drew."

        "Yes."  Jeff, probably uncomfortable in that position, shifted a little, half in his lap now, arms around him, so strong and sure.

        "You think he's a virgin?"

        "I do."

        There was something about that.  A cultural thing, probably.  Virgin.  Pure.  Sacred.  Sexy.  Jeff used to be a virgin.  Nick had taken care of that, though.

        "You're smiling."

        "You can't see it."

        "You're smiling anyway."

        "You used to be a virgin."

        "Yeah, so did you."

        True enough.  "We're going to meet Nick and Brian."

        "In 303 at nine tomorrow morning."

        "To talk."

        "To talk," Jeff agreed.

        Warm sweet Jeff in his arms.  Which was stupid; Jeff was a grown man, an adult, masculine and mature.  Just a regular guy.  A regular guy with a body like...and a smile like...and those eyes, when they looked at him...  Okay, Jeff could be sweet, sometimes, knowing just what to say to him.  But Jeff didn't taste sweet.  Jeff tasted like...salt.  Sweat sometimes.  Jeff's mouth, though, Jeff's mouth tasted like...  "Jeff?"

        "What?"

        He was grateful that Jeff couldn't see his face.  "What do you think he tastes like?"

        Jeff didn't ask who "he" was.  Jeff did ask, "Where?"

        Nick closed his eyes in mortification and for strength.  "His mouth."

        "Good.  He tastes good.  Sweet.  He's a sweet guy."

        Yeah.  Change the subject.  "You said...the three of us."

        "I thought that Nick and Brian would...stay.  But Brian said it's just us."

        "Why not just invite everybody and have an orgy?"

        "Nicholas Scott Timmons-Lachey."

        "Sorry.  I'm surprised."

        "That they won't be...watching?  Me too.  I don't think I'd mind."

        "You'd be okay with Drew's boyfriends watching you...wa..."  He was not going to finish that sentence.  The words would not come past his throat.

        "They wouldn't be sitting in the corner like jerk-offs at a peep show, Nick.  I thought Drew might want them there anyway.  For support.  But this is private, and I think that Brian wants to respect that."

        "Bet Nick wouldn't mind watching."

        "Don't start.  I don't hear you offering to leave me alone with Drew."

        "He's going to say no.  He's going to say no and then he'll hate me forever and then he'll-"

        "He won't.  He won't. He might be scared, but he doesn't need to be."

        "I'm terrified."

        "You don't need to be."

        "You're not?"

        "I am.  But I trust you, and I trust Drew, and I trust Brian, and I trust Nick.  I trust Brian and Nick to take care of Drew.  I trust you and Drew to take care of each other.  I trust what you and I have together, and I trust what Drew and I have."

        "What do you have?"

        "Drew and I are very close.  We work together and live together.  We love each other, we love you."

        "You love sex with men."

        "Who doesn't?"

        "Justin."

        "Let's worry about that later.  I think we're dealing with enough right now."

        "How do I go home and look at my mother?"

        "Don't be ashamed to love Drew."

        "When Drew told me he was gay he said maybe he should move to San Francisco."

        "I remember."

        "You just remember hating the bridge."

        "Did you have a point?"

        "Maybe I should move to Philadelphia."

        "The city of brotherly love.  That's funny.  You're joking.  Are you feeling better?"

        "It's a defense mechanism.  I'm joking to keep from throwing myself out the window."

        "That had better have been a joke."

        "I won't kill myself."

        "Good."

        "I'll let Drew kill me."

        Jeff's hand came to Nick's chin as Jeff eased back a few inches; Jeff pulled Nick's face around to his until they were looking at each other.  His thumb rubbed over the corner of Nick's mouth.  "You okay?"

        "I'm scared."

        "I'm here.  Big tough Jeff won't let anything bad happen to you."

        "You're short."

        "Taller than Drew.  Hey, that might be nice, kissing somebody I don't have to reach up for."

        "You're not going to make me smile."

        "Can I keep trying?"

        "No."

        "You're no fun."

        "My leg's asleep."

        "You're the one who pulled me into his lap like Santa Claus.  Hey.  Ask me what I want for Christmas."

        "It's July."

        "You've never heard of Christmas in July?  Ask me."

        Nick sighed.  "Okay.  What do you want for Christmas?"

        "Fame.  Fortune.  Talent.  Love.  Killer biceps.  More talent.  Close friends.  Loving parents.  And, let's see, a husband people all over the world would kill to get."

        "You have all that stuff."

        "Okay, then, for Christmas I want said husband to take me to bed and make love to me and forget about anything else outside of this room."

        Nick's hand slowly felt its way down Jeff's back.  "Will you make love to me instead?"

        Jeff's eyes softened.  "Okay."  Jeff didn't ask why.  Maybe Jeff knew why.  Maybe that was one of the reasons that Nick loved him.

        "We have to do this?" Nick asked.

        "AJ asked us to.  He's letting us off easy.  Don't tell me you're embarrassed to sing in public, Nick."

        "Can't we just forget it?"

        "No.  And don't pretend to forget the words, either."

        "Okay.  Okay!  Let's just get this over with so we can take Drew upstairs and have sex."

        "Make love."

        "Fuck."

        "Make love."

        "Shag."

        "Make love."

        "Can we just do it?"

        "I'm trying to."  Brian grabbed Nick's hand and walked into the dining room.  He sat on the edge of a round table near the doorway, Nick stopping in front of him.  The majority of their companions was sitting at two tables several feet away, near the wall.

        Nick glanced over; AJ looked pretty glowery and pissed.  He wondered what he'd missed and turned back to Brian, who quietly hummed the melody.  Nick was used to following Brian a cappella, but not for this song.  These weren't all his lyrics, either, and he didn't know why AJ was asking him to sing AJ's solo.  Kevin would think they'd gone off the deep end, and Howie would-

        "Start," Brian whispered, and hummed it again.

        "Make me," Nick muttered.

        Brian's hand fisted in the front of Nick's shirt and pulled Nick in to him.  "Nickolas Gene Carter, you sing this song.  If you sing this song, we can get Drew and go upstairs and you can get him to do to me what he did to you this morning.  We are singing this song because AJ asked us to, and AJ is the one who talked to Jeff, and Jeff will talk to Nick, and then we will talk to Drew, and then that full-body tingle you had is going to become an orgasmic explosion tomorrow night.  You just think about Drew...and Jeff...together.  In a bed.  Naked.  Touching each other.  You want to see their naked bodies rubbing against each other, you sing this song."

        So Nick sang, launching into Howie's verse.

        The dining room fell silent.

        "...when I look into your Spanish eyes, I know the reason why I am alive, and the world is so beautiful tonight."

        Brian sang the chorus, "It's a place I've never been, and it comes from deep within, and it's telling me that I'm about to win first prize.  Knowing all I have to do, is reach out my hand to you, any time I want to look into your Spanish eyes..."

        AJ turned to the person at his right with a low glare and asked tightly, "What do you think of our music now?"

        When the semi-impromptu concert ended, Nick saw Drew smiling in the doorway.  He hurried over there, ignoring both the sincere and mock applause from the seated audience.  "Brian made me do it."

        "You sounded good.  You're very talented.  Both of you."

        "I wasn't overemoting?" Nick asked.

        "Will you ever forgive me for that?" Drew asked.

        "I will," Nick said, "if you do something for me."

        "What should I do for you?" Drew asked.

        "Fuck Brian so hard he passes out again."

        Drew turned red but recovered nicely.  "You'll forgive me, but that sounds like something I'd do for Brian, not for you."

        "Oh, I'll enjoy it," Nick said.

        Drew nodded.  "I shall do my best."

        "Your best what?" Brian asked, joining them.

        "We're going upstairs now," Nick said.  "To be naked and sweaty."

        "I'm beginning to wonder why we ever leave the bed," Brian said.  "We keep ending up there anyway."

        "So let's not ever leave it," Nick said.  "Come on, faster, faster."

        "These pushy bottoms," Drew murmured.  Nick burst into laughter and hugged him.

        "Notice he doesn't try to deny it," Brian said.

        "You think I'm pushy now," Nick said, "Drew, my sweet Drew, just wait until I'm on top."

        Back in the dining room, Howie said, "I didn't know we were having dinner and a show tonight.  I would've dressed for it."

        "That's a good song," Joey said.  Chris and JC booed; Justin pelted him with pieces of bread.  "It is!  I can't help it."

        "Best song on 'Millennium,'" AJ said.

        "That's saying a lot," Chris said.

        "Let's be fair," Lance said.  "The Backstreet Boys have good music.  Some good music.  I think."

        "I've heard rumors that they don't totally suck," Justin Jeffre admitted with a smile.

        "Unfounded rumors," Chris said.

        "There are some good lyrics," Lance said.  "Some good lines."

        "Like what?" JC asked.

        "'I've had many years of grace,'" Lance said.  "I like that."

        "'The Perfect Air Conditioner,'" Chris said.  "The Backstreet Boys are big boys now, they write their own music."

        "Oh, and *NSYNC's original songs are just...poetic," Howie said.

        "I especially like 'Space Cowboy,'" AJ said.

        "It has a very strong message.  Very meaningful," Howie said.

        "What's that line..."  AJ pretended to think hard, ignoring *NSYNC's heated glares.

        "How does that go?" Howie asked.  They looked at each other and broke into it:

        "Why-yi-yi-yippie-yi-yay-yippie-yi-yo-yippie-yi-yay, why-yi-yi-yippie-yi-yay-yippie-yi-yo-yippie-yi-yo."

        "Practically Shakespeare," AJ pronounced.

        "Okay," Justin Timberlake Chasez said, standing, "you suck.  Officially.  Forever.  Hard."

        "JC does, too," AJ said.  "Pretty well, from what I heard."

        "AJ," Kevin said.

        "Oh, JC," AJ panted, "oh, oh, JC."

        With catlike grace, Justin was on the table, headed straight for AJ.  AJ made a come-on gesture with one hand, getting to his feet.  Kevin got between AJ and the table while JC said, "Justin!  Justin, come on," he urged, "forget it."

        "I just want to poke out his Spanish eyes," Justin growled, crouched at the table edge, ready to spring.  Kevin pushed AJ farther away from Justin.

        "Try me," AJ said.

        "You bastard!" Justin shouted, and launched himself at AJ, reaching past Kevin.  "You were listening to us!  You little motherfucking-"

        "You were making such beautiful music together," AJ said, dodging blows as Kevin tried to hold back Justin.

        "That was private!  You motherfucking son-of-a-bitch!  You think you're so-"

        "Justin, Justin," JC said, managing to get behind Justin, trying to hold onto him.  "Justin.  Come on.  Come here."

        "I'm gonna kill him!" Justin screamed.  "You bastard!"

        "You're not killing anyone." JC said, wrapping his arms around Justin to control Justin's fury.  "Come on."

        "I'm gonna kill him," Justin promised, shaking in JC's arms, glaring white-hot hatred at AJ.

        "It's okay," JC said.  He held Justin to love and comfort now, not to restrain.  He barely moved but the difference was visible, as was its effect on Justin.  "He's just a jerk who thinks he's better than we are."

        Justin turned in JC's arms.  Their audience could almost feel them unconsciously shutting out everyone else.  "But he said-"

        "But he's wrong.  He's not better than we are.  You and I both know you're better than anyone else on the planet."

        "I am not."  Justin let JC distract him.

        "Name me one person who's better than you."

        "Uh...Jesus?"

        "Okay.  Maybe.  I seem to remember Jesus teaching love and forgiveness.  Not violence.  I don't think that Jesus would try to kill AJ.  Even if AJ is a motherfucking son-of-a-bitch bastard."

        "He hurt you.  He said-"

        "Sshhh.  Come here, baby."  JC kissed Justin gently, chastely.  "People say things.  AJ's not the first to say something about me.  Or my lame lyrics."

        "They're not lame.  I like them."

        "Then AJ's wrong.  Misguided.  Confused.  We should be finding him help, not killing him."

        "So I should turn the other cheek."

        "Exactly.  I don't want you wasting yourself hating him."

        Justin closed his eyes and breathed.  "Okay."

        "Okay?"

        "Okay."  Slowly, Justin's eyes opened.  "Okay."  He moved away from JC's embrace, calmer now.  JC met Joey's eyes and nodded toward the door.  Joey and Lance guided Justin from the room.

        "That's nice," AJ said to JC.  "Got your baby to turn the other cheek."

        JC watched Justin go.  When the doorway was clear, he turned to AJ and looked hard into AJ's eyes.  "Like I said, I don't want him wasting himself hating you.  But you hurt Justin, and I do not forgive and forget.  Don't ever, ever, say anything to hurt him again.  I don't let anyone, especially not arrogant dramatic self-absorbed overhyped overrated oversexualized twits, hurt Justin.  I didn't when he was Justin Timberlake, and I sure as hell don't tolerate it when he's Justin Timberlake Chasez."

        "You gonna hit me now?" AJ asked.

        "I don't condone violence."  JC's face tightened.  "You hurt Justin.  You embarrassed and humiliated him, you mocked him in front of his friends, you made fun of the most beautiful sound in the world, you shamed him for letting me love him, I should snap your fucking neck.  You want to insult my music, that's one thing.  You could approach it on a professional level; I'd be happy to talk about lyrics and rhythm with you.  But you insult Justin...  If I didn't know it would hurt him even more, I'd hit you like you hit Nick, I'd-..."  JC remembered to breathe.  "But I'll take a cue from Brian's book.  At least one of the Backstreet Boys has some class."  JC turned and walked out of the room.

        "Go Miss Chasez," AJ said.

        "Shut up," Kevin said, and left him alone with Howie, Chris, and Justin Jeffre.

        "Nick insults Brian, Drew, and Nick; Brian defends himself and them verbally; AJ hits Nick," Chris said.  "AJ insults JC and Justin; JC defends himself and Justin verbally...  Guess it's my turn."  One clean blow, AJ's head snapping back with the force of it.  Chris shook out his hand and smiled.  "How's that medicine tasting?"

        "Bastard."

        "Sshhh."

        "Should've hit him."

        "That wouldn't have helped."

        "Bastard."

        "Sshhh.  It's over."

        "Did you hear-"

        "I heard every word.  I wanted to kill him myself for daring to..."  JC remembered to breathe.  "It's okay."

        "Revenge is wrong.  Revenge is wrong," Justin said.  "I'm so tempted to-"

        "He'll pay.  Nobody hurts my baby and gets away with it."

        "JC?  What...are you going to do?" Justin asked, worried.

        "Don't worry.  I don't have to do anything.  AJ hurt himself enough."

        "What do you mean?"  JC unwrapped himself and led Justin by the hand from the elevator to their door.  "JC?"

        "We've been so full of each other we almost missed something," JC said, unlocking the door.

        "What?" Justin asked.  JC led Justin into the room and closed the door, muffling his reply.  The next audible sound was Justin's disbelieving, "What?!"

        Nick was the first to break from the mesh, finally rising onto his knees and reaching for the tube of lubricant on the table, slapping it into Drew's hand.  "Fuck him before I come."

        Brian looked up at Nick from where he'd been busy licking between Drew's thighs.  "I'm doing something here, do you mind?"

        "You can do that later," Nick said.  "Come on, please?"

        Brian looked to Drew for his opinion.  Drew said, "Either way, I'll be happy."

        Brian smiled and tugged gently on Drew's pubic hair, making Drew inhale sharply.  "Guess you will.  Okay," he said, and stretched on his back, hands folded over his stomach.  "Go ahead."

        Drew rolled to his side, fingers trailing up over Brian's erection.

        "You can practice deep-throating later," Nick said.  "Really.  On me.  Every minute.  Just do this first."

        Drew reluctantly let go, to Brian's relief, and sat up, opening the tube.

        "Open," Nick told Brian, sliding his hand up Brian's outer left thigh.  Brian's feet planted themselves flat on the mattress, thighs spread, hips tilted.  "God that looks good," Nick said.  "Let me-"

        "No."

        "Just-"

        "It's not your turn."

        "I'll be quick."

        "That's not going to convince me."

        "I want to, please," Nick said, crawling over Brian, kissing Brian into a moan, draping himself over Brian's body, left hand in Brian's hair, right hand on Brian's balls.  "Just a little, please..."

        "Nick, no," Brian protested weakly.

        "Please, please, please," Nick said, licking into Brian's mouth.  "Please, I want you, I want to, I'll be so good..."

        Brian moaned and caved.  "Okay, god, okay, Nick, just let...oh...let Drew stretch me first."

        "And then I can fuck you?"

        "Yes."  Brian moaned when Nick's fingertip traced circles around his asshole.  He felt the muscle flutter in hopeful response.

        "And then Drew can fuck you?"

        "God, I hope so."

        "You're going to love it."

        "If you don't kill me first.  Nick, stop it."

        Nick gave him an unrepentant smile and kiss, then rolled off of him.  "On with the show!  Your turn."

        Brian closed his eyes to center himself.  It wouldn't do to come now.  Maybe he should.  "Drew?"

        "What?"  Soft lips brushed his cheek.

        He opened his eyes, turned his head slightly, accepted Drew's kiss.  Then he brought his hand to the back of Drew's head and said, "Please," guiding Drew down a bit.

        "Now?" Drew asked.

        "No," Nick said, "no, bad Brian."

        "Please," he told Drew.

        "No!" Nick protested.  Drew kissed Brian and crawled down Brian's body.

        "I'll get you for this," Nick warned Brian.  But then Drew's tongue licked lovingly along the vein running up Brian's cock, and Brian didn't care.  Although he wondered how advising Drew to lick his slit because it made him "freak out" was payback, and he decided to thank Nick for that later, as soon as he collected his brains, which seemed to be leaking out with his pre-cum.  Then Drew decided to practice deep-throating, and the world turned white...

        When Brian opened his eyes again, he was lying in the same place as before, only on his stomach, on a pillow.  Hands, Nick's hands, were spreading his thighs.  There was a bit of whispering that he didn't catch, since his ears were still ringing, and then Nick was there, lying beside him, tracing patterns on his back with one finger.  "Guess what?" Nick asked.

        "It's a good thing I trust you."

        "You're gonna love it."

        Gentle fingertips stroking over his butt.  Nice.  Nick's hand came to the back of his neck.  He wondered why; then he felt soft kisses where the fingertips had been, and he turned to look, but Nick's hand held him still.  "No peeking," Nick ordered cheerfully.  Sadist Nick.  He filed that idea and closed his eyes.  Nice.  Oh.  Wait.  He was spread more, opened, and ooohhh...

        "Like that, don't you?" Nick asked.

        He would have replied but he couldn't, couldn't speak, and his voice no longer worked, and his eyes were open but he couldn't see anything, and there was...there was...  He was glad, suddenly, that he'd already come, because this really would have taken care of it.

        "Harder," Nick said.

        Drew's gentle, soothing lapping changed drastically as Drew's tongue breached Brian's body.  Brian's voice snapped into being and a moan welled up from deep within him.  He closed his eyes, pushed up, brought his knees beneath himself, tried to open up more, encouraging, and he couldn't stop making that sound.  The moan had lessened into a steady, aching, greedy sound, deeper than a whimper but about as needy.

        "Deeper," Nick said.

        Brian wondered briefly why they were so cruel as to do this to him.  Oh, they probably thought that he was having fun.  It would be fun, really it would, if it weren't killing him.  He reached under his body and wrapped his fingers around his poor aching cock.  Hadn't he just come?  He pulled at himself, rocking back a little.  He'd never guessed that this would happen.  With Nick, yes, Nick had done this to him, and it was fantastic, but Drew?  Drew Lachey?  Drew's tongue fucked Brian like Drew's cock had fucked Brian once; thorough, explicit, brutal as it forced ecstasy through every fiber of Brian's being.  He couldn't have withstood this if he'd tried.

        It stopped.  Drew licked delicately around the outside of his ring of muscle, and now he really was whimpering.

        "On your knees or face-to-face?" Nick asked.  Brian groaned, unable to articulate a reply.  Nick rolled Brian's limp form over, exposing his vulnerability and full, angry cock.  Brian panted, gazing at the ceiling simply because it was there, not really seeing it, but feeling everything.  He felt the first tentative push of Drew's finger.  Felt Drew's touch inside; felt Drew's finger, like Drew's love, work its way deeper within him.  His body screamed for more while his brain begged for the overload to stop and his mouth seemed to be offering nothing from his throat but quiet, raw noises.

        Note to self: sex is bad for the vocal chords.  To save your voice and your career, stop having sex.  Or, make love twenty-four hours a day and ditch the career.

        Two fingers twisted deep in Brian's body and the choice was made for him.

        He'd been here before; he knew how this went.  Nick had made love to him too many times to remember, and Drew had made love to him before, once, six months ago, alone in a hotel room.  He was the first man, the first person, Drew had entered.  They'd been nervous and desperate and he could remember the helpless look in Drew's eyes when it had seemed that they'd never make it to the end.  Drew's hard cock throbbing in his hand, pre-cum pouring over his fingers, and-

        Brian's body twisted against Drew's touch and he cried out at the sudden, deep shock of pleasure.  Drew's fingers left him and he panted.  No more, no more, no more.

        "Your turn?" Drew asked Nick.

        Nick smiled and accepted the tube with a deep, lingering kiss.  "I'll just warm him up for you."  Nick's fingers slipped into Brian's body with an expert touch and Brian almost screamed.  "Good work," Nick told Drew, flicking once to make Brian gasp.  He slicked his cock and slid into Brian in one long, slow, even stroke.  Brian's body rose beneath his and Nick heard Drew's soft, appreciative sound.  Making love to Brian was like coming home for Nick.  It was the closest they could ever get.  He looked down into Brian's eyes, and Brian looked up at him.  He thrust, thrust, back and forth in Brian's body, watching, waiting.  When Brian started to rock restlessly and Brian's eyes started to glaze over, he knew that his work here was done.  He slowed the tempo until Brian's eyes cleared, at which point he pulled himself free.

        "Please," Brian breathed.  Nick kissed Brian's nipple and Brian moaned.  Nick turned to Drew, who was breathing a little erratically.  Deciding to do the honors himself, Nick got his fingers slick and spread the lubricant over Drew's cock.  A thing of beauty it was, long and thick, flushed dark, hot and hard, throbbing impatiently, drooling into Nick's hand from the slit in that deliciously flared head.  Nick licked pre-cum from his fingers and sighed with pleasure.  Then he gathered more and slid his fingers into Brian's open mouth.  Brian sucked on his fingers like they were his cock, hips rising in a plea for attention.  Nick had to withdraw his hand before he came from the sensory overload of tasting Drew and seeing Brian and feeling that tongue and hearing Brian's hungry noises overlaid by Drew's soft awed sounds.

        Nick looked at Drew.  "Don't keep him waiting.  Brian gets pissed afterward if you make him beg too hard for it."

        Drew moved over Brian, on top of Brian, cock in hand.  Brian looked wonderfully grateful to Drew for making an appearance, and spread in invitation.  Drew's fingers slipped in between Brian's legs, through coarse curly hairs and past tight balls toward that wet, hungry hole that sucked eagerly at his fingers.  Brian shuddered and tried to get closer.  Drew lifted Brian's hips, his own stuttering forward with undisguised interest.  He filled Brian as carefully as he could, until he was as far as he could go and Brian's heartbeat was alarmingly quick.  He was in, in, in Brian, and it felt just...wonderful, fantastic, incredible.  He moved, slid back a little, and pushed in farther-

        -and Brian screamed, pulsing hot white between their bodies-

        -and it felt good, so good, so good, so good, more, more, Brian's scream echoing in his head drowning out his own constant sounds, the tight hot tight hot clenching around his cock as he drove onward in a relentless quest for something, something so close he could feel it sparking around the edges of his consciousness, right there, if he just pushed a little farther he'd find it-

        -there-

        -and he came.

        And no one heard Nick Carter's stunned, hushed, "Wow."

        "Good morning."  JC's kiss drifted down over his pelvic bone.

        "Can I wake up like this every day?"

        "You already do," JC reminded him.  He'd had something else to say, but that felt good, JC's mouth on his balls.  He didn't know why his balls ever left JC's mouth, they were so happy there.

        "JC."  JC hummed around his balls and the pleasure just thrummed up his spine.  Now he had no idea what he'd wanted to say.  Then he was released from the warmth of JC's mouth, and JC's tongue was going down...down there, JC's hands lifting his hips still higher.  Funny, when he was elevated like this, shouldn't the blood drain down from there?  But no, there it was, feeding his pulsing cock.  He wanted JC's attention on his cock, that would be really nice right now, but then JC might, technically, have to stop licking elsewhere, and that felt...so...good...  He was making noise again, he realized, soft aching happy sounds mixed with JC's name.

        "Oh, JC, oh, oh, JC."

        He shut his mouth.

        And looked, suddenly, into blue eyes.  Angry blue eyes.

        "Don't do that," JC said, voice soft and encouraging at all odds with the anger.  "Please don't let him do that."

        "What?"

        He should've known he couldn't bluff JC.  "Let him win.  I love it when you say my name, Justin.  Those sounds you make, the ones deep from the back of your throat, the soft ones you don't even know you're making, those satisfied ones, and when you beg me, oh, Justin, when you beg me...  I need that, Justin, I hear it and it does things to me.  You always do things to me."  He knew he was scowling only because JC's thumb was trying to smooth the lines from his brow.  "Baby, please.  You can't be embarrassed.  To love me?  To let me give you pleasure?  To let me know that you're feeling that pleasure?  I only want to make you happy, you know that's all I want, and when I can hear that I'm succeeding, when I can-"

        "Everybody else can hear it, too.  They all know."

        "Justin, the door's closed, the windows are closed, no one's standing in the hallway listening at the door, you're not screaming."

        "Not yet," he muttered.

        JC kissed the corner of his mouth.  "What we have in here, this is private.  What happens between us when we make love, it's private.  I'm sorry about yesterday.  You were right, I never should have...you were right.  I'm sorry.  We shouldn't let anyone else in on what we share."

        "The piano," Justin said.  "He heard us."  JC nodded.  "It was make-up sex.  It's supposed to be...intense."

        "What we have is intense already," JC said.

        "Yeah."  He ran his hand over JC's shoulder.  "You're wearing clothes."

        "I'm sorry about yesterday.  Exposing you like that.  And the fight with AJ.  What we have is very intimate and very personal, and I don't want anyone else near it, especially not like that.  But I don't want you to inhibit yourself, close yourself off."

        "You like me noisy?"

        "I guess I do."

        "Can I make you noisy?"

        "It's still my turn."

        "Mm, you stopped, my turn now."

        "I wasn't finished."

        Justin reached between their bodies and tugged up JC's tank top.  "Off, off."

        "I wasn't finished," JC insisted weakly.

        Justin, to stop further argument, rolled them over, rising up on his knees astride JC.  "My turn.  Yesterday you..."  He thought about it.  "Wow, yesterday was awesome, we have to do all that again.  But today's my turn.  To thank you."

        "For what?"

        "Loving me, wanting me, marrying me, defending my honor, fucking me senseless, that sort of thing."

        "Oh."

        "I'm big bad Justin Timberlake Chasez, international heartthrob and kick-ass performer.  And when I go to bed at night, after my rough long day at work, in some strange hotel in some foreign country with scary protestors outside, I get my brains fucked right out of my head, and I can sleep like I'm safe and cosy at home.  Because I'm JC's baby, and he's holding me warm and tight.  And nobody fucks with JC's baby."

        "That's right."  JC fluffed his curls for him.

        He peeled up JC's shirt.  "You're my baby, too."

        "I know."

        "What makes you sleep warm and safe at night?"

        "Holding you."

        Nick sat beside where Jeff was lying.  "Go back to sleep."

        "Come back to sleep with me."

        Nick shook his head.  "Can't sleep."

        "You're worried about today?"

        "I'm having nightmares."

        Jeff pushed himself up, reaching for Nick's arm.  "Nightmares?"

        "I dream about you sometimes," Nick said.  "I dream about you a lot."

        "That's good," Jeff said, smiling.  "I like that."

        "I haven't had a...dream...about anyone else for a long time.  A long time."

        "Are we having two or three conversations here?" Jeff asked.  "Sex.  You're talking about sex dreams.  You had a sex dream that wasn't about me, and that constitutes a nightmare?"

        "I'm not going back to sleep if I'm going to dream about that."

        "About Drew?"  Nick shook his head.  "About whom?"  Nick scratched his chin.  "Nick.  Talk to me."

        "About...Nick and Brian."

        "Both of them?"

        "It was just Brian, it started out with just Brian, and then Nick was just there suddenly, and..."

        "That's not a nightmare.  Besides, Nick, come on, it's a dream.  It doesn't prove anything, it doesn't mean anything.  Come here, lay down.  Lay down."  Nick obeyed, and Jeff settled into his arms.  "I'm over here dreaming about Justin breaking his leg and you're over there making out with Nick and Brian.  Not fair."

        "Justin breaking his leg?"

        "See?  You get the good stuff.  Now just close your eyes and go to sleep."

        "We have to see them in two hours."

        "Don't think about that."

        "How can I not?"

        "You're not going to sleep, are you?"

        "No."

        "All right.  Do you want breakfast or sex first?"

        "Sex."

        "Okay.  Let me go to the bathroom.  Think about where you want me."  Jeff yawned and left the bed.  Nick watched him go, broad strong upper body, slender hips, tight round ass moving; and any thoughts of anyone else drifted toward the horizon in the dawn.

        Nick, lying behind Brian, pulled Brian's sleeping body closer and said to Drew, "Hey."

        Drew looked at Nick.  "What...happened?"

        "When?"

        "I...Brian..."

        "You had sex with him.  Remember sex?  Tab A in slot B?  Moaning and fireworks?"

        "He screamed."

        "Yeah."

        Brian frowned in sleep and moved back into Nick while one hand reached forward where Drew had been.

        "He...what did I do?" Drew asked.

        Brian's hand patted across the sheet.

        "I'd say you fucked him really really well.  Brian would say you made love to him."

        "But he..."

        "The scream?  That's what's bothering you?" Nick asked.

        "Nnk," Brian muttered, barely out of sleep.

        "Brian?" Nick asked softly.

        "'ere's 'ew."

        "He's right here.  Go back to sleep."

        "'ere?"

        Nick reached over and took Drew's hand, put it into Brian's.  Brian's lips twitched in a smile and he sank back into sleep.  Nick waited until Brian's breathing evened, then said, "He's not acting like a rape victim, is he?"

        Drew's mind shuddered violently from the very idea.

        "You've made Brian scream before," Nick said.  "I know I've made him scream.  I've screamed.  It's not really manly, but it happens."

        "I scared you and made you cry, I don't know what I did to Brian.  I'm not doing very well, am I?" Drew asked.

        "Drew - - would you get over here so I can pet you?  Thank you."  Nick stroked up Drew's arm, reaching over Brian's hip.  "You're getting these reactions because you're the best we've ever had.  Except each other.  You're doing really well here.  Really really really really really well.  There's the sappy stuff about how we love you and we're just glad to be near you, and there's the stuff like Brian said about how every time you touch us we feel...all that stuff he said.  And there's the stuff about how when I felt your big, hot, hard cock shoving into my tight ass I-"  Drew put his hand over Nick's mouth.  Nick's fingers traced around the tattoo wrapping Drew's right upper arm, one fingertip outlining the "L."

        Brian's fingers tightened around Drew's as Brian's eyes opened.  Drew removed his hand from Nick, who grinned at him.  "Hey," Brian said, smiling up at Drew.  Brian tugged gently on Drew's hand, and Drew came forward as though Brian were pulling a leash on a collar, unable to resist and not in command of his movements.  "I never got the chance to thank you," Brian said.

        "For what?" Drew asked, heart pounding.

        "Giving me the most orgasmic near-death experience ever," Brian said, and kissed him, hands on his shoulders then sliding down his back.

        "Did I hurt you?" Drew had to ask.

        "Never," Brian said.  "You need to stop worrying."

        "He just needs more experience," Nick said.

        "Wait," Drew said, sitting up and frowning.  "I..."

        "Made love to Brian," Brian suggested.

        "I made love to Brian," Drew repeated with a faint blush.  "Then I...  I didn't wake up.  Did I?"

        "Nope.  You've both been out since you passed out," Nick said.

        "Then where's...  I'm clean."

        "Oh," Nick said.  "I took care of it.  You're not easy to move when you're passed out, by the way."

        "Thank you," Brian said to Nick.

        "Just another benefit of the three-party system," Nick said.

        "Did you just make an ironic reference to national politics?" Brian asked, amused, disbelieving.

        "My tutors taught me something," Nick said.  "I think.  Not sure."

        "When you made love to Brian you didn't...come," Drew said.  "And then we fell asleep."

        "Don't worry about it," Nick said.  "I came just watching.  You guys have to do that again soon."

        "What time is it?" Brian asked suddenly, sitting up with a faint look of anxiety.

        "Seven thirty," Drew said.

        "Liam," Nick said.  "We have to see Liam.  Shit.  I'll shower first."

        "Nick," Brian said, "when was the last time I was sore after sex?"

        "You use those muscles so often I thought you were past that," Nick said.  "Not to ruin your reputation or anything.  You're sore?"

        "I'm aching in new places."  Brian rubbed a hand along the back of one thigh.

        "This is great," Nick said, smiling broadly.  "Now Drew has to fuck you lots more.  For exercise.  It's good for you."

        "I hurt you?" Drew asked.

        "Just made him more limber," Nick said.  "Everybody gets sore muscles after sex.  Well, maybe not Justin."

        "I don't want to ask," Brian said.  "I won't ask.  Go shower."

        "You're not sore?" Nick asked Drew.

        "A little," Drew admitted, testing.

        "The full-body morning-after ache," Nick said.  "Get used to it.  Time for my shower.  You're all welcome to join me."  He kissed Brian, kissed Drew, kissed Brian, kissed Drew, and departed for the bathroom.

        "I'm sorry," Howie said.  "It went too far.  Way too far."

        "Hey, I totally flipped," Justin said.  "But I appreciate it."

        "We both do," JC said.  "Thanks."

        Chris interrupted the handshaking with a loud cough.

        "What?" Justin asked, turning to the table.

        "Chris pulled an AJ on AJ," Howie said.

        "After you guys left," Chris said.

        "What?" Justin asked.

        "I hit him," Chris said.

        "You hit AJ?" JC asked.

        "You know that's not cool," Justin said.

        "Then why are you laughing?" Joey asked.

        "I'm not laughing," Justin lied.

        "Bad Chris," JC said.  "Bad bad bad Chris."  He kissed the top of Chris' head.  "Thank you."

        "I can stand up for myself," Justin said.  "I don't need my friends and relatives defending my honor."

        "Yes, we all noticed you running across the table to kill AJ," Joey said.

        "I hope it either heals or gets covered by make-up," Kevin said.  "We have a concert Sunday night.  How hard did you hit him?"

        "You haven't seen it?" Howie asked.  "It's bad."

        "Brian's was worse," Lance said, "but his should fade sooner."

        "Can we stop the violence?" Kevin asked.

        "It's not like anyone's going to hit you," Chris said.

        "I don't think that's the point," Joey told Chris.

        "I agree not to hit anyone for the rest of the week or weekend," Justin said, "because he might hit back, and then JC might hit him, and then JC might get hit, and I like JC's cheekbones the way they are."

        "I agree not to hit anyone even if he deserves it," Chris said.  "Anyone else, I mean."

        "Things are bad enough around here without throwing punches," Lance said.

        "With Justin and JC back together, and the honeymooners locked in their room, the drama should die down," Howie said.

        "So we can have a nice boring few days?" Joey said.  "Finally."

        "So we can see Liam," Nick said.

        "Am I supposed to believe you?" Drew asked.

        "Believe us, no.  Trust us, yes," Brian said.  The doors opened.

        "All right, in you go," Nick said, giving Drew a quick kiss.  "Drink your milk."

        "Play nicely with the other children," Brian added with a kiss.

        "Bye-bye!" Nick said cheerfully.

        "I'm coming back in two seconds!" Drew said as the doors closed.

        "This had better go well," Brian said to Nick.

        "I forgot to get mace, but I have on my running shoes," Nick said.  Brian went to 303 and unlocked the door.  Just as they were entering, Jeff and Nick came around the corner down the hallway.  Brian held the door for them.  Everyone came into the room; Brian locked the door and turned on the light.  The four stood together in the entryway, finally meeting each other's eyes.  Nick Carter looked hyper with nerves; Brian looked determined; Jeff looked very calm; Nick Timmons-Lachey looked ill.

        "You've talked about it?" Brian asked, to start the discussion.

        "We agree to your terms," Jeff said, offering a slight smile to ease the formal language.  "You'll talk to Drew alone?"

        "Yeah," Brian said.  "It should be easier without all of us there."

        "If he agrees, we'll do it here?  What time?"

        "Nine."

        "I don't know what Drew will say about it, and I don't know how you feel," Jeff said, trying to broach the subject delicately, "but you're welcome to...be here."

        Brian was surprised.  "We'll see."

        "I'll go first, like you said," Jeff said.  "That might be easier."

        Brian nodded.

        "Are we finished?" Nick Timmons-Lachey asked.

        "If you don't want to do this," Brian said, his tone understanding and nonjudgmental, "you-"

        "I'm doing it," Nick said.  "Not for you, not for Jeff, not for Drew.  For me.  I'm doing it for me.  I don't want to stand here and negotiate."

        "Will you do it?" Nick Carter asked him.  "If we talk to Drew and he agrees and then it comes down to it and you freak and run-"

        "I'll do it," Nick said sharply, cutting off Nick with a glare.  "I'll be here."

        "Make sure," Nick said just as sharply.

        "We can't start fighting," Brian said.  "We all have to be together on this or we drop it."

        "I really think you should stay," Jeff said.  "Tonight.  So Drew understands that you're supportive."

        "If he asks us, we'll stay," Brian said.  "As long as we have your permission.  I don't want to intrude on anything this intimate."

        "We'll show up here at nine," Jeff said.  "If Drew wants no part of it, just let us know."  He left, followed by his husband.

        [Is it fair to compare Justin and JC to Jesus and Shakespeare?  Who's closing doors in AJ's face, and why?  How will Brian and Nick ask Drew if he wants to commit consensual incest?  Tune in to "No One" Part Five.]