Lesson One

Copyright December 30-January 1, 2000 by Matthew Haldeman-Time

Rating: NC-17

Pairings: Lance Bass/Kevin Richardson, Nick Carter/Justin Timberlake, JC Chasez/Brian Littrell

Disclaimer: The young men who comprise the Backstreet Boys and *NSYNC are their own people.  The author has not met anyone here described, nor does the author mean to suggest that these people act this way in real life.  This writing is a work of fiction.  I make no money from this venture.

Dedication: Ewan McGregor and the Savage Garden slashers.  Whoever positioned Nick and Brian like that on the back of the self-titled album.

Wherein one person has a crush; two people have a secret; and I think they'd have beautiful children.



Alla

        It was a secret.  Not a very well-kept secret, since everybody knew.  Or, Justin, Lance, Chris, and Joey knew.  They wouldn't tell anybody.  Mostly because they knew that if they did, JC would kill them.

        JC was a lot stronger than he looked.  He looked like 50 pounds of scrawny.  But the four of them didn't doubt that he could kick some serious ass if he were so inclined.

        JC had no bark.  But when he bit...

        So they respected his secret.  They pretended not to notice where his attention strayed during awards shows.  They even let him play those godawful CD's.

        He was pretty cool about it.  It was kind of like he was just a normal fan with a crush on a big rock star or something.  He did his thing - - worked, slept, dated, all of the normal stuff - - and kept an eye out for upcoming Backstreet Boys appearances, made sure he got the new CD as soon as possible, perked up whenever a certain someone's name was mentioned.

        Justin was never sure whether they were supposed to know about it or not.  Like, yeah, okay, JC was gay.  They knew that.  But were they supposed to know that JC had a crush on Brian?  Or were they supposed to be oblivious?  Was he allowed to ask about it?

        Because he sure as hell had questions.

        Like, "You do know he's straight, right?"

        And, "JC, he's a Backstreet Boy."

        Which was a pretty big hurdle for Justin, at least.  But JC seemed willing to overlook it.  Maybe love did make people stupid.

        It wasn't love, though, was it?  Love...that was some pretty serious shit right there.  JC in love.  JC in love, period, was pretty scary.  JC in love with Brian?  Mind-boggling.

        Maybe it was just a sexual thing.

        No way.  Justin could understand if it were just a sexual thing for Kevin, maybe.  Or even AJ.  But a sexual thing for Brian Littrell?  No way.

        But probably the whole thing was a secret, anyway.  So he couldn't ask.

        But what JC saw in that straight, short, Southern Backstreet Boy, Justin just did not know.


        "He's straight."

        "I know."

        "He's short."

        "I know."

        "He's, like, from Mississippi."

        "I know."

        "He's in *NSYNC."

        "I know!"

        Nick shook his head.  "We're calling you a doctor."

        "All I said was I think he's cute."

        "He's too young for you."

        "He's older than you are."

        "I'm too young for you."

        "I don't want you."

        "You want him?!"

        "I didn't say that!" Kevin protested.

        "His head's too big."

        "What?"

        "Have you looked at him?  He's only just starting to grow into it."

        "Get out of my room."

        "His eyes aren't bad, though."

        "Out!"

        "You know he bleaches his hair."

        "Out!"

        "He's short!"

        Kevin slammed the door in Nick's face.

        "He can't even sing!" Nick shouted through the wood.


        "Oh my god turn that off before I die," Chris said.

        "What?" JC asked, startled.

        "You call that singing?  They call that singing?  He's whining, he's moaning, he's shrieking-"

        JC turned off the CD.

        "They can't sing," Chris said decisively.  "They must be stopped."

        "Stopped from what?" JC asked.

        "What's going on?" Lance asked, coming in and dropping beside JC on the sofa.

        "We're going to kill the Backstreet Boys," Chris said.

        "Great," Lance said.  "Which one first?"

        "Nick," Chris said.

        "Sounds good," Lance said, scratching his knee.  He elbowed JC.  "What do you think?"

        "I wouldn't mind getting rid of Nick," JC admitted.

        "Hey!  Get in here!" Chris yelled down the aisle.  Joey staggered in a moment later, looking half-asleep.  Justin wandered in after him and sat on JC.

        "What?" Joey asked, sitting on the floor.

        "We're going to kill the Backstreet Boys," Chris said.  "Starting with Nick."

        "Can we make it bloody and gory and gruesome?" Justin asked.

        "Yes," JC said.

        "Can we frame one of the others for it?" Lance asked.

        "Howie killed him in a lovers' quarrel," Justin said.

        "Thought about this much?" Chris asked Justin.

        "Oh, come on, you know they're both gay," Justin said.  "They couldn't be more obvious."

        "You think they're doing each other?"

        "Maybe," Justin said.

        "They're both bottoms," JC said.  "It would never work."

        "Really?" Lance asked.

        "Yeah, really, he has it on videotape and everything," Justin said.  Lance smacked Justin's arm; Justin smacked Lance's shoulder; Lance hit Justin back; Justin hit Lance; JC shoved Justin onto the floor.

        "Do we know they're gay for a fact?" Chris asked.

        "Short of a signed confession, yeah," Justin said.  "They're so obvious.  And Nick's all over Howie, in public and everything."

        "But Howie's...cheap and smarmy," Lance said.

        "I think he's supposed to be sexy," JC said.

        "Since when?" Justin asked.

        "They're all supposed to be sexy," Lance said.  "They're just not doing it right.  Kevin's sexy, but-"

        "What?" Chris asked.

        "Kevin?" Justin asked.

        "He's sort of sexy," Lance said.  "Compared to the rest of them."

        "Yeah, but..."  Justin shuddered.

        "Kevin is sexy," Chris said, and thought about it.  "Kevin is sexy," he tried again, and squinted.

        "AJ could be sexy," Justin said.

        "He's got some flavor," JC said.  "Kevin's okay.  Physically."

        "Appearance-wise," Justin agreed.  "As opposed to personality-wise.  So, what.  Kevin's sexy, relatively, and AJ's cool, relatively.  Howie's cheap and smarmy."  He grinned at Lance.  "Nick we're killing, so who cares?"  Justin stopped talking.  Chris and Lance studied the air.  Joey snored.

        "Guys, you can say his name," JC said, half amused, half impatient.

        "So what about Brian?" Justin asked, as though there had been no pause.

        "He's cute," Lance said, shrugging.

        "He's scary looking," Chris said.

        "He's sort of..."  Justin struggled for language.  "He's sort of normal.  Like he could be a real person if he weren't a Backstreet Boy."

        "Scary looking?" Lance asked.

        "He has a huge jaw and big nostrils and no eyes," Chris said.  "And his mouth-"

        "Chris, shut up," Justin said.

        "He asked," Chris said.

        "It's okay," JC told Justin.

        "See?" Chris said to Justin.

        "But shut up anyway," JC said to Chris.

        "Okay," Chris said.


        "Kevin wants Lance," Nick said, standing over Brian's bed.

        "Lance who?" Brian asked, running a hand over his hair, pushing himself up onto one elbow.

        "Lance Bass, *NSYNC Lance," Nick said.

        "Kevin wants Lance?" Brian asked, just as lost as before.  "For what?"

        "That's what I want to know," Nick said, sitting on the bed.

        "Did he tell you that?"

        "Yes."

        "Kevin wants Lance," Brian repeated.

        "We can tease him now.  We're seeing them next week."

        "That's right," Brian remembered.  "They'll be there."

        "Lance is straight, isn't he?"

        "I thought so," Brian said.  "They're all straight."

        "Guess Kevin's out of luck, then.  It should be a good time, though."

        "What should?"

        "The party.  Where are you?"

        "Kevin wants Lance?"


        "Stand still," Justin whispered to Chris.

        "I'm excited."

        "You're not the one with a crush on - - are you?"

        "No!" Chris said quickly.  "I have taste.  I just want to see."

        "You know JC's not going to talk to him."

        "Why not?"

        "He said he wouldn't."

        "You asked him?"

        "We'll have to do it for him."

        "Talk to Brian for him?"

        "Get Brian to talk to him."

        "How?"

        "Someone talks to Nick.  Brian will come over to talk to Nick.  The other one of us brings over JC."

        "I'm not talking to Nick."

        "I'm not doing it."

        "You have to."

        "I have to?"

        "I'll get JC."

        "But-"

        Chris left.  Quickly.

        Justin groaned.


        Nick glanced at Justin's cornrows.  "Nice braids."

        "Thanks.  JC did it."

        "JC does your hair?"

        "I can't do it myself."  Justin's eyes flickered.  "At least I do something to my hair."

        "You saying something?"

        "Just making conversation."  Justin wondered where Brian was.  And where Chris was with JC.  He glanced around the room.  Stared.

        "What?"  Nick followed Justin's line of sight and saw Brian stepping up to JC.


        Lance tapped Joey's elbow and tipped his chin in JC's direction.

        "Hey," Joey said.  "Good."

        They watched.

        "You know what?"

        "What?" Lance asked.

        "Their children would be freaky looking."

        Lance laughed.


        "How'd it go?" Justin asked, following JC into his hotel room.

        "You two were talking for a while," Lance added, following too.

        "It was great," JC said, and shed his jacket.  "It was great."

        Justin and Lance looked at each other.

        "He was so interested in what I had to say.  Full of questions.  A great listener."

        "What were you talking about?" Justin asked, because someone had to.

        "Lance!" JC shouted.  Lance jumped.  "We were talking about you!  He wanted to know all about you, everything about you, like you're the most fascinating person on the face of the earth!"

        "Me?" Lance asked.

        "I'm your best friend, and even I don't care about you that much!"

        "That was harsh," Justin said.  "Besides, you're my best friend."

        "Why was he asking about me?" Lance asked.

        "I think he wants you," JC said, and sat heavily at the foot of his bed.  "I think he's bi."

        "Shit," Justin said.

        "Shit," Lance echoed.


        "What was going on with you tonight?" Kevin asked Nick.

        "Nothing," Nick said.

        "You were talking to Justin Timberlake."

        "So?"

        "For two and a half hours."

        "So?"

        "You hate Justin."

        "He hates me, too."

        "What were you talking about?"

        Nick shrugged.  "Nothing."

        "For two and a half hours?"

        "It wasn't that long."

        "Yes, it was."

        "You were timing me?"

        "Stop deflecting and answer the question."

        "Deflecting?"

        "Answer the question."

        "What question?"

        "Why were you talking to Justin?"

        "Why do you care?"

        Kevin gave up.


        "I never knew how bad JC had it until I saw him with Brian," Justin said.

        "I know," Lance said.

        "If Brian wants you-"

        "He doesn't."

        "Sounds like he does."

        "I don't want him."

        "That doesn't help JC."

        "Maybe I should talk to him.  Brian."

        "Who do you want?"

        "Nobody, really."  Lance grinned.  "What about you?"

        "What about me?"

        "You and Nick looked pretty cosy."

        "Cosy?"

        "Cosy."

        "That's sick."

        "I haven't seen you blush since you were-"

        "Shut up."

        Lance laughed.


        "Hello?"

        "Hey, Justin."

        "Who is this?"

        "It's Nick."

        "How'd you get this number?"

        "Did anyone teach you phone manners?"

        "You can't just call me."

        "Why not?"

        "You know why not."

        "You came over to me the other day.  Stood there and jabbered at me for two and a half hours.  Now I can't call you?"

        "I wasn't - - I was there, you were there, it was a party.  It wasn't a personal thing."

        "You didn't have to come over and talk to me."

        "Why are you calling?"

        "I don't know."  Nick hung up the phone.


        "Hello?"

        "Brian?  It's Lance Bass."

        "Hey, Lance."

        "I didn't get to talk to you at the party.  I just wanted to congratulate you guys."

        "Oh, thanks.  We were really surprised."

        "You should've been."

        Brian laughed.

        "The reason I'm calling...JC said you were asking about me."

        "Yeah."

        "Why?"


        "Hey."

        "It's Justin."

        "Oh."

        "Sorry."

        "For what?"

        "Don't be a jerk about it."

        "I'm being a jerk?"

        "Can we just forget about it?"

        "It's forgotten."

        "You didn't tell anybody, did you?"

        "Tell - - I didn't tell anybody.  I didn't even tell Brian."

        "You didn't?"

        "You did?"

        "No.  No.  I just...you tell Brian everything."

        "Not that."

        "Thanks."

        "I don't want anybody knowing, either."

        "Yeah."

        "I didn't mean it like that."

        "How did you mean it?"

        Silence.

        "Nick."

        "It was good, wasn't it?"

        "It was terrifying as hell."

        "You thought you were scared?  I was the one on my knees."

        "You started choking, I didn't know what I was going to do, yell for help or zip up."

        "It was only for a second."

        "You'd better mean the choking."

        Nick laughed.

        "Have you...since then?"

        "Guys?  Just a couple.  Three.  You?"

        "None."

        "None?"

        "None."

        "You are gay, aren't you?"

        "I'm bi, thanks.  Were you...I was the first, right?"

        "Yeah.  So, you're bi?  And your one and only gay experience was when you were fourteen?  You're just going to live on girls the rest of your life?"

        "I can't exactly go out and get a boyfriend, Nick."

        "Yeah, but at least you could get somebody to get off with."

        "That's cheap."

        "Don't you want guys?"

        "Yeah," Justin said, squirming.

        "So get some."

        Justin laughed.  "Where?"

        "Anywhere.  They're half the population, you know."

        "I can't just go picking up random guys.  You've only had three since me.  You know the press is out there.  God, you're gay and you've been doing girls?"

        "I close my eyes and pretend they're somebody else."

        "Brian?"

        "Don't go there."

        "Tell me you don't want him."

        "He's my best friend.  You want JC?"

        "I'm so horny right now I'd take anybody."

        "Girls aren't satisfying you?"

        "They don't work it right."

        "Tell me about it."

        "Oh, like you're open-minded on that subject."

        "You said it first."

        "Yeah, but I like girls."

        "You like guys."

        "I like both."

        "You're not doing both."

        "I can't."

        "We could do each other."

        "No."

        "I know you want to."

        "No."  He closed his eyes.  His cock was hard.  "We can't."

        "I won't choke this time."

        Justin laughed.  "Nick."

        "Let me do you."

        "Do what to me?"  He put his hand between his legs.  His joints hurt with the fear and anticipation.

        "Anything you want."


        JC rolled to his stomach and crossed his arms over his pillow.

        Brian wanted Lance.

        Brian wanted Lance.

        Lance.

        That hurt.  That hurt a lot.  That hurt like pins and needles and nails and knives and fire and oh god...

        And he was mad.  Mad.  At Brian.  Why Lance?  Why not him?  What the fuck was wrong with him, what was so great about Lance, why couldn't Brian want him?  What made Lance so special?

        He knew Lance, he liked Lance, he loved Lance.  He knew what made Lance special.  He thought Lance was pretty damned special.  But what did Lance have that he didn't?  Why did Brian want Lance?

        Why didn't Brian want him?

        Chris had suggested that it was the way he dressed.

        Joey said that maybe it was a short Southern guy thing.  That Brian gravitated towards his own kind.  Because Southerners were inbreeders anyway.  Chris then pointed out that Brian should want Kevin, if that were true.  Joey made a face and said, "Who wants Kevin?"

        Lance said that there was no reason on earth why Brian shouldn't like JC.  Except, maybe, the way he dressed.

        Justin rubbed his arm and said, softly, sincerely, hurting for him, "I don't know, Jace."  Which helped, somehow.

        He'd been jerking off, thinking about Brian, when he'd realized that Brian was probably lying somewhere jerking off and thinking about Lance.  Which would have killed his hard-on, except that the idea of Brian jerking off, Brian's hand on Brian's dick, made him even harder.

        Brian touching himself.  God, what JC wouldn't give to see that.

        Or to help.


        "Kev?"

        Kevin looked up and smiled.  "Hey."

        Brian sat beside him.  "Something's going on with Nick."

        "What now?"

        "I don't know."

        "You don't know?"

        "He won't talk about it."

        "He tells you everything.  Normally we can't get him to shut up about his problems.  And he always talks to you."

        "I know."  Brian hesitated.  "Do you want Lance?"

        Kevin groaned and slid down in his seat.  "I'm going to kill Nick."

        "He's really nice.  I like him."

        "He's nice?"

        "He is.  I talked to him for an hour and a half on the phone the other day.  I had no idea how much fun he is."

        "Do you want Lance?"

        Brian laughed.  "No.  I thought you did, and I wanted to check him out, so I talked to JC about him.  Lance called to find out why I was grilling JC."

        "You're approving my potential dates before I even get interested?"

        "So you don't want him?"

        "I hardly know him."

        "Do you want him?"

        "He's good-looking.  He's smart and he's friendly and he has more to him than the rest of *NSYNC."

        "I think he's gay."

        "What?"

        "I think he's gay."

        "He's not gay."

        "We're gay."

        "We're bi."

        "I think he likes men.  You like men.  You like him.  Get to know him, ask him out."

        "You're kidding."

        "I'm not kidding."

        "I can't ask him out.  Brian, do you know what the media would do if-"

        "I know what the media would do.  The media won't know a thing about it.  Forget the media.  You like him.  You should like him; there's a lot to like.  Get to know him, and ask him out."


        "You okay?" Lance asked, sitting beside JC.

        "Yeah."

        "What's up with Justin?"

        "He wants to screw Nick Carter."

        "What?"

        "He wants to screw Nick Carter."

        "Why?"

        "Years ago - - Justin was fourteen, so Nick was fifteen, I guess - - Nick gave him a blowjob when we were all in that hotel in Orlando, you remember?  That competition, we were-"

        "What?"

        "It was right before the Boys were leaving for Europe.  Nick gave Justin a blowjob.  Justin freaked out.  Nick freaked out when Justin freaked out.  Ever since, they've acted like they hate each other."

        "He was fourteen?"

        "That party the other week, they started talking.  Nick called Justin.  Justin called Nick.  Now they're jerking off over the phone and trying to figure out when they can see each other."

        "How do you know all of this?  Tell me you're making it up."

        "No, it's all true.  Justin tells me everything."


        "Nick, are you okay?"

        "I want to fuck Justin."

        "Justin who?"

        "Justin Timberlake."

        "Timba Timba Timbalake?  Why?  You hate him."

        "I want him."

        "You don't like him."

        "I know.  I want him anyway.  He makes me hard."

        "Can we start at the beginning?"

        "You got an hour?"


        "You're making it with Nick Carter?!"

        "Whoa," Justin said.  "Hi."

        "You're making it with Nick Carter."

        "No.  Not yet.  Later.  Maybe.  JC!"

        "He's sleeping.  You're doing Nick?  When were you going to tell us?" Joey asked.

        "I'm not doing Nick.  I don't even like him."

        "But you're on the phone with him every night."

        "Not every night."

        "You really like him?"

        "No!  I don't like him.  He just turns me on.  It's a physical thing.  He's immature and self-centered."

        "Then why does he turn you on?"

        "He knows how to work it."

        "Work what?"

        Justin shrugged.  Smiled.  "Everything."


        "Three days," Nick said.  "Think you can wait that long?"

        "Yeah," Justin said.

        "I don't think you can."

        "You don't?"

        "I think you want it now."

        "Want what now?"

        "Me."

        "I don't want you."

        "You don't?"

        "You're a jerk."

        "So are you."

        "I am not."

        "Says who?"

        "Everybody."

        "Nobody who knows you."

        "What are you going to do?"

        "When?"

        "In three days."

        "When?"

        "To me."

        "I know you're hard right now."

        "No you don't."

        "I do."

        "I'm not."

        "You are.  You want to know what I'm going to do to you?"

        "Yeah."

        "Wait and find out."

        "You'd better be able to deliver.  If you're a lousy lay-"

        "Don't worry about that."

        "Yeah, right."

        "I'm damned good."

        "You've been with like three other people."

        "So?"

        "So that's not a lot of experience."

        "You think I can't do it for you?"

        "I've got doubts."

        "You won't once we get started."


        "What do you think of Kevin?"

        Chris looked at Lance.  "Kevin.  Richardson?  He's tall."

        "He sings bass," Joey said.

        "He thinks he knows how to dance," Chris said.

        "You think you know how to dance," Lance said.

        "No, I don't," Chris said.

        "Why?" Joey asked Lance.

        "Just wondering," Lance said.

        "Out of nowhere?  You just sit around thinking about what we think of Kevin?" Chris asked.

        "You need some new hobbies," Joey told Lance.


        "I need some new friends," Nick decided.

        "I'm not good enough anymore?" Brian asked.

        "You don't have anybody.  If you had a boyfriend, I could talk to you about stuff.  But you don't have anybody."

        "You can talk to me about Justin whether I'm dating a guy or not."

        "Yeah, but you can't talk to me about your boyfriend if you don't have one."

        "You want me to get a boyfriend?"

        "It'd be good for you."

        "Kevin's getting a boyfriend."

        Nick grinned.  "He and Lance are going to get it on tonight?"

        "They're going out for coffee."

        "That's boring."

        "Maybe I should date one of *NSYNC, too."

        "Yeah, go ahead, make out with Joey."

        "Oh," Brian said, wincing.  "That hurt."


        "Brian doesn't want you?" JC asked.

        "No," Lance said.  "He doesn't want me."

        JC gave Lance a quick hug.  Half of him felt knee-weakening relief.  Brian didn't want Lance.

        On the other hand...Brian probably wanted someone else.  And whether or not Brian wanted Lance, he still didn't want JC.

        At least with the thought that Brian wanted Lance, JC had had a target.  A sure feeling.  Something real to give his attention.  Now...now everything was up in the air again.  With no reassurance.  If Brian wanted Lance, JC could believe that Brian just hadn't woken up to the idea that JC was a good thing.  Now, it was possible that Brian had considered JC...and dismissed him.


        Chris and Joey were sitting in Justin's hotel room.  Justin was wearing tight cotton and tighter leather, barefoot, standing by the mirror and trying to fix Lance's hair.  Lance didn't want his hair fixed.  JC was sitting on the low dresser, beside the mirror, watching Justin and Lance.

        "They're a mess," Chris said.

        "Over the Backstreet Boys," Joey said.

        "How did this happen?" Chris asked.

        "When did this happen?" Joey asked.

        "I'm glad I'm straight," Chris said.

        "Amen," Joey said.

        The phone rang.  Justin dove for it, landing sprawled across the bed.  "Hello?  Right.  Great.  Thanks."  He hung up the phone.  "They're here.  Get out of my room."


        Nick Carter at twenty was a lot bigger than Nick Carter at fifteen.  Taller, yes.  Also more solid.  More masculine.  More real.  No nervous, greedy boy.  Nick was a man now.

        Physically, anyway.

        And Nick at twenty was confident.  Not a self-centered adolescent, but confident.  He knew what he was doing.  He knew what he wanted.  He knew what Justin wanted.

        Probably Justin just had the same on buttons that all guys had.

        Still, that was some pretty impressive stuff.  Apparently you could pick up a hell of a lot from just three guys.

        And now Justin had Nick asleep in his bed.

        He still didn't like Nick.  Nick was immature and overrated and egocentric and not very bright.  Nick couldn't sing, either.  But damn could the boy suck cock.

        And he was kind of cute.


        Chris tugged on Joey's elbow.  "Check it out."

        Joey looked around and saw Brian sitting down beside JC.  "Shit."

        "Stay cool," Chris whispered to JC.

        "He can't hear you."

        "I'm sending telepathic messages."

        "Then don't say it out loud."

        "It helps if you whisper it."

        "I still say they'd have freaky-looking children."

        "They can't have children."

        "No, but if they did.  They'd be all cheekbones."

        "They'd have some kick-ass talent, though."

        "From JC."

        "Right."


        Justin shivered and sat up in bed.

        This was not happening.

        This was not happening.

        He licked his lips.  He could still taste it.  Feel it.

        He'd never realized how hard giving a blowjob might be.  And that had to have been the sloppiest one ever.  But god, it had been...scary and exciting and really, really good.  Fun and new and slightly dangerous, and it had made him hard, made him really hard, made him almost come, just doing that.  Just having that in his mouth, tasting that on his tongue, getting up close and personal with it.  Making Nick come.

        And then...

        And then...

        And he'd done it, done that, really done it.  To Nick.

        What if Nick wanted to do it to him?  Wanted to...wanted to fuck him.  Do him like he'd done Nick.

        Yeah, he was gay.  And he wanted to fuck guys.  Especially, damn, now that he really had done that, he wanted to do it again, couldn't wait to do it again, got hot just remembering.  But did he want that done to him?

        Yes and no.

        Because yeah, that was what he wanted.  It was just this thing...this thing that sounded scary and gross and sick and scary, but at the same time was just what he wanted.  What his body wanted.  He could feel himself wanting it, could feel his body wanting it, muscles contracting in anticipation.  Being entered like that, being filled like that.  Getting fucked.  He wanted to get fucked.

        But it sounded way too scary, too.

        And now that he'd done it to Nick, it was even more terrifying.  And even more what he wanted.


        Lance was smart.

        Funny.

        Nice.

        Fun.

        Interesting.

        He had beautiful green eyes.  He laughed like sex.  His hair was soft against Kevin's fingertips, his skin softer.  When he moaned, Kevin's cock swelled.  When he came, Kevin swallowed.


        Nick was cute.  He was a very enthusiastic kisser.  He had beautiful hands.  He made Justin hard.  He snored just a little.  He loved having his balls licked.  He had really nice balls.

        When Justin cried - - just a little, a very little - - he understood.

        His body was very warm.

        So...maybe...was his heart.

        Justin started to think about that.


        "Lance is in Kevin's room."

        "Really?"

        "Right now."

        "It's kind of early."

        "He's been there."

        "Been there?"

        "Since last night."

        "He's been there all night?"

        "He slept in Kevin's room."

        "Is Kevin in there?"

        "Yes."

        "No."

        "Yes."

        "Fuck me."  There was an impressed silence.  "Lance slept with Kevin."

        "Yes."

        "Why?"


        "We should get up."

        "No we shouldn't."

        "We can't just stay in here."

        "Why not?"

        "Our friends."

        "I've spent enough time with them."

        "Food."

        "Room service."

        "Someone's going to notice."

        "No one's going to notice."

        "If the press-"

        "The press won't find out."  Nick kissed his nipple, sucked on it.  Ducked down and licked his pelvic bone.

        "You don't care that - - shit, Carter."  Justin moaned, spreading his thighs.


        Brian stared at JC.

        "I didn't..."

        "Oh."

        "I..."

        "Oh."  Brian shook his head to clear it.  "I didn't.  Sorry."

        "Brian," JC said desperately.

        "Excuse me."  Brian disappeared.


        "Please."

        "Manners, now?" Justin asked.

        "It might work better than, 'Suck me, bitch.'"

        "Is that what you normally say?"

        "No.  Once."

        "What'd she do?"

        "Giggled."

        "She did not."

        "Are you going to do it or not?"

        "You know you're a lying whore."

        "Suck me, bitch."

        Justin laughed.  And did.


        JC checked the peephole.  Wanted to disappear.  Unlocked the door.  Opened it.  "Brian."

        "May I come in for a minute?  Please?"

        JC nodded, let Brian in, locked the door again.  Just for security purposes.  He faced Brian, forcing himself to meet Brian's eyes.  They were lovely eyes, a lighter shade of blue, tilted just enough to be intriguing.

        "I didn't know."

        "I know," JC said.

        "I'm sorry."

        "It's okay."

        "Do you want to get food?"

        "Just us?"

        "Everybody else is busy."

        "Sure."

        "Can we eat in here?"

        "Sure.  I'll call room service."


        Lance's body.  Masculine but young.  Buffed but soft.  Solid.  Lance had better stamina than Kevin expected from a twenty-one-year-old, and was satisfyingly sexually curious.

        Besides making love, they slept, ate, peed, and showered.  They also shaved, after a period.  And they talked.  About anything.  Everything.  Themselves, their work, their friends, their families, their plans.  Sports and politics and religion.  Cartoons and sneakers and rollerblades and miniblinds.

        They made love in the shower.  The water was hot and the tile was freezing and they almost slipped and fell.  But Lance looked beautiful wet.


        They ate jumbo shrimp and drank cherry Coke and thought up terrible song lyrics.  JC ate Brian's French fries, and Brian ate JC's ice cream, and then JC kissed him.  He tasted like hot fudge sauce.  His lips were cold from the ice cream, but his mouth was hot-

        JC's ass hit the floor.

        "Sorry."

        "Sorry."

        "Sorry."

        "Sorry."

        "Just shut up for a second."

        "Sorry."

        JC put his hand over his eyes.

        "You..."

        "Just..."

        "You want me to go?"

        "No."

        "JC-"

        "Just go."

        "I'm sorry."

        "I'm sorry."


        "What?"

        "What?"

        "What did you say?" Nick asked.

        "Nothing."

        "What did you say?"

        "I'm having sex here.  I don't know, I probably moaned or something."

        "You said that you love me."

        "What?" Justin asked.

        "You said, 'I love you.'"

        "I did not!"

        "You did!"

        "I did not!  I don't love you."

        "Duh.  No kidding."

        "So?"

        "So why'd you say it?"

        "I didn't!" Justin exclaimed.

        "You said that you love me."

        "I don't love you!  I don't even like you!"

        "You'd better not."

        "Can we just keep screwing here?"

        "You can, you know."

        "What?"

        "Like me."

        "I don't."

        "You could."

        Justin kissed him to keep from answering.  And the cool thing was that Nick kissed right back.


        "We're leaving in the morning."

        "I know."

        "We're leaving pretty early."

        "I know," JC repeated.

        "If there's anything you want to do."

        "What would I want to do?"

        "Do something.  Take care of something.  Talk to somebody."

        "Yeah.  I did enough."

        "Talk to him."

        "About what?"

        "Anything."

        "No."

        "You're going to have to."

        "No, I'm not."

        "Yes, you are."  Joey turned quickly and went around the corner.  JC, puzzled, moved to follow - - and came face-to-face with Brian.


        Justin heard himself now.

        Heard himself saying little things like, "Want you," before he kissed Nick's mouth.

        Or longer things like, "God I want you so much," before he licked Nick's cock.

        And then he said, "Wanted you for so long," before he sucked on Nick's earlobe.

        Which wasn't true.

        Wasn't.

        Wasn't true.

        He hadn't wanted Nick for long.

        Not...not too long.


        Lance was solid beneath him.  Murmuring low by his ear.  Stroking firm, gentle hands down his back.  Whispering sex.  Moaning porn.

        Later, Lance slept.  Warm and heavy in his arms.  He smoothed the exaggerated arches of Lance's eyebrows until his own eyes closed.


        Justin was sullen.  JC was high-strung.  Lance was quiet and stunned-looking.  Chris and Joey treaded lightly.  For about two minutes.  Then:

        "What happened?  You two were shacked up with the Back-Assed Boys the whole time," Joey said.  "And you, what happened to you?"

        "We had sex," Justin muttered, and scowled at nothing.

        "We had sex," Lance said, and blinked.  His re-entry into the earth's atmosphere seemed a bit slow.

        "Good sex?" Chris asked.

        "Yes," Lance said.

        "Nick sucks," Justin said, and got up, and walked off.

        Joey nudged JC's knee with his foot.  "Hey."

        "He...  He kissed me.  Brian kissed me and..."

        "And?" Chris prodded.

        JC turned red and put his hands in his lap.


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