Alla
Copyright May 28, 2001 by Matthew Haldeman-Time
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: JC Chasez/Brian Littrell
Disclaimer: The young men who comprise the Backstreet Boys and *NSYNC are their own people. The author has not met anyone here described, nor does the author mean to suggest that these people act this way in real life. This writing is a work of fiction. I make no money from this venture.
Dedication: This slashfic is for Ewan McGregor and the Savage Garden slashwriters.
Wherein JC kisses Joey, dances with Lance, and punishes Chris.
"JC, get your skinny butt back here!"
JC turned and ran full-speed, dodging at the last second to avoid slamming into Justin, spinning and popping up behind Joey.
Lance watched JC bounce along beside Chris. "You okay there?"
JC grinned. "No," Chris answered for him.
"Can we tether him to something?" Justin asked.
"JC, calm down," Joey said.
JC ran in front of Joey and grabbed Joey's face in two hands, kissed Joey's nose, darted around Justin, and tried to dance with Lance, who stopped walking and waited patiently for JC to stop pulling at his arm. "JC, calm down."
"Look! There he is!" Chris shouted, pointing. JC began to fling himself in that direction before realizing the joke and drumming a rhythm on the back of Chris's head in good-natured punishment.
"JC," Justin tried.
"He's coming!" JC said, bouncing around Justin. "He's coming! He's-"
"He's a funny-looking Backstreet Boy," Lance said. "Have some self-respect."
"Have some dignity," Chris said, giving JC a wary glance.
Justin and Joey bounced up and down in time with JC.
Lance sighed and kept walking.
"Yeah." Brian scratched
his leg and smiled. "He sounded so excited..."
Kevin sat beside AJ. "Where's Brian?"
AJ turned a vague thumb. "Talking to the Sink Child."
Kevin decided against making a disgusted face as he heard Brian's laughter.
"...no, I can't - - ha ha!
- - he didn't," Brian said, sounding entertained. "Doesn't he - -
Lance didn't even care?" More happy laughter.
Joey didn't really get it. They didn't like the Backstreet Boys. The Backstreet Boys liked them even less. But JC couldn't get enough of Conversations with Brian. The funny thing was, the two never met in person. Never saw each other. They'd even been in the same city and spent the night on the phone instead of trying to meet.
Weird.
JC tried to shut up instead of chattering at Brian. He pretended to concentrate on driving, and Brian pretended to care about the scenery.
When they got to his place, he got nervous. He shouldn't be nervous. It was only Brian. But when he let Brian into the apartment and explained about there being only one bedroom and only one bed and Brian could sleep out here, which Brian already knew and didn't need explained because he'd mentioned it over the phone, his face turned red when he said "bed" and he started talking too fast and he wasn't sure where to look.
Brian went to use the bathroom.
JC called for food. He was out of ice cubes. Bottled water would be okay. He went back to the living room and handed a bottle to Brian and sat on the sofa. How close made sense? He was used to sitting with the guys, and he'd forgotten how personal space worked with regular people. He rested his elbow on the back of the sofa, half-turned, one ankle propped on a knee. It was sort of weird to see Brian. They talked all of the time, daily, hours at a stretch... But seeing Brian, being face-to-face, was surreal.
He picked at the label on his bottle of water, keeping his eyes focused on the details. That made it easier. He heard Brian and looked at other things, and he responded to Brian and looked at other things, and it was like being on the phone, feeling very close to someone very far away. He forgot to be anxious, nerves soothed by the familiar sounds of Brian's voice, Brian's laughter, Brian's understanding silences. Then he remembered that, for the first time, he and Brian were in the same place in more than a psychological way. They shared space. Shared a sofa.
And then JC couldn't stop staring. Staring at Brian, Brian's face, Brian's mouth, Brian's eyes. The skeptical lift of his eyebrows. The seraphic tilt of his cheekbones. The-
Door. Food. Brian came with him, juggling boxes, trying to pay at least for half. Then they were alone, and relaxing, and joking, and eating, and talking, and fun. This was fun, Brian was fun, JC's heart was floating.
Hours passed, and JC knew that they had to part for sleep sooner or later. Before he could stop himself, he heard his own voice offer to share the bed. He'd shared a bed before, with the guys; it was no big deal. No, Brian would be okay out here. Okay. He tried to clean up a little, and wondered how he'd make the couch comfortable. He'd only had this apartment for a month, and he still forgot where he'd stored things like extra blankets. Assuming that he had any extra blankets.
His phone rang, giving him an excuse to make an exit instead of standing there hemming and hawing over saying "good night." He picked it up in the kitchen. "JC."
"Tuck him in yet?" Chris asked.
He could hear Justin laughing in the background. "Tell baby blue eyes to get to sleep. He's too young to be up this late. And get to bed yourself, you old geezer." He hung up and went to brush his teeth. He could already guess that his morning call would come from Joey, on behalf of Lance, who would never actually place the call but would manage to get Joey to do it.
Brian had a pillow and what passed for bedclothes, knew where the bathroom was, had a toothbrush, etc. His duties as host were complete. He could sleep with a clear conscience.
"JC."
Brian had not been wearing that a second ago. He could see naked shins. Calf muscles. The hair on Brian's thighs. And the faded blue of that T-shirt did wonderful things for Brian's eyes. This was what Brian looked like ready for bed.
"Thanks for inviting me over."
"Thanks for coming. It's good to see you in person."
Brian smiled. "I feel like we've spent all of this time getting to know each other, and being in the same room is just a formality. It's not. I didn't realize how seeing you would change things."
"Change things?"
"Solidify. To see your face when you smile. To see your expressions and your gestures. I feel like, as much as I thought I knew you, we're closer now. I didn't know what we were missing."
He felt his forehead crease when he frowned. He could tell, from Brian's tone... "You thought we were missing something?"
"I didn't know what it was," Brian said. "I felt like I was getting to know you, coming so close..."
JC tried not to exhale too much when Brian stepped closer. He didn't want to breathe all over the man.
"You know why I can't sleep in your bed with you."
He nodded.
"We've never talked-"
"If you're uncomfortable-"
"I don't want you to be uncomfortable," Brian said. "If I make you nervous, if you think I'm..."
"I know you won't, it's not," JC gathered coherency. "You won't come on to me. We're friends."
Silence. "Good night," Brian said.
"Good night." JC felt the strange urge to kiss Brian's cheek, but didn't entertain the thought of actually doing it.
They parted there in the
hallway. JC went to bed alone. Restless, he rolled to his stomach
and stroked his pillowcase smooth with sensitive fingertips. Brian
was here. Brian was here. Brian was here!