banner by Vanessa
Copyright October 24-29, 2001 by Matthew Haldeman-Time
Rating: R, I guess
Pairing: Brian/Nick/Drew
Disclaimer: The young men who comprise 98 Degrees and the Backstreet Boys (as well as *NSYNC) are their own people. The author has not met anyone here described, nor does the author mean to suggest that these people act this way in real life. This writing is a work of fiction. I make no money from this venture.
Dedication: This slashfic is for Ewan McGregor and the Savage Garden slashwriters.
Wherein they talk about pulses, faulty memories, and JC's groupie.
Notice: Hi.
banner by Vanessa
"Do you like my neck?"
"Hi, Nick." Drew felt warm and happy. He rolled to his stomach on his bunk, propping himself on his elbows.
"Do I have a good neck?"
"Yes, I like it very much."
"Have you looked at Justin's neck? Not your - - I mean JC's groupie."
Drew frowned, trying to remember. Oh! He reached under his pillow and pulled out a few teen fan magazines. He flipped through starstruck pages until he found a decent photograph of Justin Timberlake Chasez. Drew's eyes narrowed as he scrutinized Justin's neck.
"I like JC's neck," Nick said. "I like..." He fell silent.
Drew tried to guess what was wrong. "You like what?" he asked, to buy himself time. When Nick stopped talking, it usually meant that Nick was stopping short of crossing into forbidden territory. Either something was wrong with Brian, or...
"Nothing."
Drew let Nick off the hook for the moment. "Why are we talking about Justin's neck?"
"I just got off the phone with JC. We were talking about, you know, the fluttery pulse there? On the right side?"
"Yes."
"JC likes Justin's."
Drew waited.
Nick was quiet.
Drew flipped pages, finding now-familiar pictures of Nick and Brian.
"I think that Brian likes my neck."
"He does," Drew agreed.
"It's kind of long. When I put my head back, he always goes for it."
"It's irresistible," Drew said.
"When he tilts his head back like that, you can see his jaw. It's... I have to have some."
Drew smiled. "I know."
"I remember... I remember putting my head back, and I guess my heart was kind of pounding or my pulse was excited, and I remember being kissed right there, just..."
Drew frowned. Nick sounded nervous.
"Oh, that felt good, Drew. Did he ever do that to you?"
Drew caught himself before he answered, realizing where Nick might be going. He hesitated. Nick had to mean Brian. They'd been talking about Brian. Of course Nick meant Brian. But Drew's gut said otherwise. "I don't remember a lot of specifics," Drew said.
Nick's voice was quiet, private. "He made love to me once."
Drew listened.
"Brian's sleeping. He's getting too old for a life of performing and fucking. He'd better marry and settle down."
"That's a good idea," Drew said.
"I was sucking on his fingers, and I started licking all over his rings, our rings, and you should've seen his eyes. All dizzy with love and lust. He finds the weirdest stuff sexy."
"It sounds very erotic."
"You have a thing for fingers anyway."
Drew decided not to comment.
"Do you like my neck, Drew?"
"Yes."
"Tell me you like my neck."
"I like your neck."
"Why, Drew? Why do you like my neck?"
"It's...long." He tried to ignore his stirring cock.
"Long. Like my fingers."
"Yes."
"Did you get that video Brian sent? The TV special?"
"Yes."
"Did you see, in my interview, how my nostrils flared?"
"Yes," Drew said, telling himself not to be ashamed of that shivering rush of lust.
"Is that sexy?"
"Yes."
"Is my neck sexy?"
"Yes."
"He only sent you that video to make sure you'd see it, because of the nostril thing. He thought you'd like it."
"That was nice of him," Drew said.
"He's pimping me."
"He is not."
"Sending out dirty porn videos of me to his boyfriends."
"It is not a dirty porn video, and I'm not his boyfriend."
"You're my boyfriend."
"Yes, I am."
"I'm going to kiss you all over."
"Okay."
"Do you always have trouble remembering sex?"
"Not always."
"Sometimes?"
"Sometimes."
"Like when?"
"I think when... When it's too new and too shocking, it gets fuzzy. Like the first time you...when you gave me a blowjob. Sometimes I remember, and sometimes everything's a blur."
"It's not your partner, it's more."
"Right. And sometimes it's so new and important that I remember everything, clearly."
"Like what?"
"Like..."
"Drew."
He hesitated.
"Stop blushing."
"The first time I was with you and Brian together, that's blurry. But..."
"For instance?" Nick prompted.
"For instance... One of the clear times would be..."
"Spit it out!"
Drew said it too quickly. "Do you remember the second time Brian gave me a blowjob?"
There was a pause. "It was that same week, right? Was it..."
"That morning..."
"Right. And?"
"It's...it's something I remember."
"Because it was good?"
Drew hesitated. "Yes."
Nick laughed. "You're still feeling it."
He was not.
"Why do you still remember it?" Nick asked.
Nick was going to make him talk about it. Drew sighed, pushing aside the magazines and rolling to his back. One hand rested on his stomach. "He knew what he was doing."
"He had practice," Nick said. "On me."
Drew took a moment to enjoy that fact. Let the information sink in... Brian, perfecting his technique on Nick... Learning Nick's body, Nick's responses, Nick's sexuality.
"You liked it? You liked how good he was? You liked him knowing what to do to you?"
"Yes," Drew said. He'd liked it. Brian's knowledge, skill... No fumbling, no fear, only erotic professionalism and personalized technique.
"Brian doesn't drop to his knees for just anybody," Nick said. "When he was willing to do me in front of you, when he went for you, I knew. He wanted you so much, he was willing to risk fucking up my relationship with you and his relationship with me and everything. If he was willing to do that, then I knew you were worth it to him."
"I think he knew," Drew said. "I don't think that he was risking anything. He already knew."
"He was too scared."
"Knowing that it will be all right, and going ahead and doing it, are two different things. He had every right to be afraid."
"Like sex. When you let us make love to you."
"Yes. I knew that it would be all right, and I knew that I wasn't risking anything or going to lose anything, but I was still afraid to do it."
"It turned out pretty good."
"It did."
"I'm good."
Drew smiled. "Yes, you are."
"Let's go ask Brian."
"Ask Brian what?"
"If I'm good."
"He knows you're good. He'll say yes."
"Let's make sure."
"Nick, he's sleeping."
"I can wake him up."
"Let him sleep."
"Where is he? In my bunk or - - here you are. Brian, wake up, Drew wants to talk to you. Brian. Brian. Briannnnnnnnn..."
"Nick, let him sleep."
"Brian, Drew's on the phone. He wants to know if I'm good in bed. If you don't wake up and talk to me, you're in trouble. Don't turn away from me, you little - - I'm talking to you! Drew, you're my witness, he drove me to it."
"Nick-"
"Drew, I'm putting you down for a minute. Please stay on the line until our next service representative is available."
Drew sighed and waited. He listened. He scratched his chest.
Soft, shocked, a hitch in Brian's voice: "Oh, Nick, oh my god..."
Drew paid attention. Was Nick whispering? He strained to hear what Nick was saying to Brian.
Brian moaned. "Yes, yes, Nick..."
Drew's balls were going to catch fire.
"Oh, yes, god, Drew..."
Drew's eyes widened. Brian had said his name! More accurately, Brian had moaned his name. One of those soft, sexy, make-love-to-me moans.
"Drew, are you still there?" Nick had returned. "Brian wants you."
Drew coughed. "So I heard."
"You should see how horny he is."
"I'd like to."
"It's a sight. Not now, Brian, I'm on the phone. Brian! Here, play with this, I'll be with you in a minute."
"What... What did you give him?" Drew asked, aching to know.
"What?"
"You told him to play with something."
"Guess."
"Tell me."
"You have to guess."
"I'm not going to guess. Put Brian on the phone."
"Now?"
"Yes, now, please."
"He's not going to be good for conversation."
"I'm willing to try."
"It's up to you. Brian, Drew wants to talk dirty to you."
He did not! He had no intentions of doing any such thing. Drew gathered his thoughts and aimed for a conversational tone. "Hello, Brian?"
"Drew."
Had Brian just purred at him?
"We need a video conference phone," Nick said in the background. "Drew shouldn't be missing this. Here, move your - - oh my god."
Nick's voice had ended on a hushed note of awe. Drew gripped the phone more tightly. "Brian?"
"Drew."
That was it! Brian was purring at him! Drew was surprised, to say the least. He'd known Brian for years, they were married, and he'd never... This was a disturbing development, all the more disturbing because it was making Drew very, very aroused.
"Holy shit," Nick said in the background. "Brian, give me the phone. Here, come on, come on... Drew?"
Drew didn't know what to say. He was still trying to figure out what in the world was happening on the other end of the line. Mere minutes ago, Brian had been sleeping; now...
"Drew, I have to go. I'm really sorry. Can I call you back in, uh, a couple minutes?" He gasped. "Holy shit."
"Call me back," Drew said.
"I will, I have to - - motherfucker!"
Nick was gone. Drew set aside his phone and rubbed his eyes. He tried to imagine what Brian was doing. His Brian, his husband, his lover. Brian seemed to be, roughly, two-thirds poetic romantic, and one-third kink. But Drew had never known Brian to act much on that last third.
Maybe Brian's sleep had been full of good dreams, so to speak, and upon waking, Brian found it difficult to leave that world.
Drew tried to imagine what Nick had given to Brian to "play with." It could have been as simple as Nick's fingers. But Nick had sounded like a spectator, not a participant, at that point.
Drew wasn't jealous of Nick
or of Brian, but right then, he would have given anything to be with them.
"...think it was AJ's or Kevin's. Don't ask. It was sitting around the bus earlier, and I took it to Brian and said that we should use it. He decided to be conservative or straight or something, and said no, a real no, and then he went to sleep, and then JC called. Then when he was being horny and I wanted to talk to you, I gave it to him because it was right there, and what else was I going to hand to him, his pillow? I didn't think he'd do anything with it. I sure as hell didn't think he'd... He's asleep again, now."
Drew tried to wrap his mind around the idea.
"You want me to tell you what he did with it?"
Drew couldn't speak.
"He's a lot more perverted than we give him credit for."
"Nick, are you..."
"Yes?" Nick asked, amused. "He really needs a bath. So do I. We're a mess. Do you want to come over here and lick us clean?"
Drew refused to be diverted from his point. "An aerosol can of whipped cream?"
"Right. Reddi-wip. I'm thinking of sending them a thank-you card. Drew. Drew?"
"I'll pay for the postage."