Or, maybe, how I love.
Not sure.
Regardless: I love.
I was working, doing that typing thing, when I figured out how to explain how I feel about 98 Degrees. Not that there's a great demand for that information. People don't accost me in the supermarket, waving fresh produce in my face and asking, "Matthew, how do you feel about 98 Degrees?!" Yet, now that I've figured out how to explain it, I feel the need to share.
Then I wondered if I can explain how I feel about the rest of these people.
Deep breath. Let me try.
THE BACKSTREET BOYS
The Backstreet Boys.
I love the Backstreet Boys more than I love myself.
Not that I love myself all that much, but I'm working
on it.
The Boys have the ability to bring me devastation, ecstasy,
and everything in between.
I love them more than is good for me, and I realize that.
The Backstreet Boys are like a drug for me.
One second of them sends a shot of sheer, instant happiness
straight to my brain.
Pure enjoyment.
What I feel for the Boys runs so deep, and is so complex,
that sometimes it's scary.
It's frightening to know that people I've never met,
who don't know I exist,
can have such a strong impact on my life, on the quality
of my life.
It makes me feel a little less in control than I'd like
to be.
But that's how I love them.
98 DEGREES
When I was in high school, there was this group of guys.
Older guys, upperclassmen.
We were in the same study hall.
They'd sit in the back, in the corner, talking and laughing
the whole time.
They were sort of jock types, best friends, really close.
I always wanted to hang out with them.
Or be one of them.
Or do one of them.
You know, whatever.
But I never had the chance, or the nerve, for any of
that.
So I'd sit there, and eavesdrop, and try to watch without
getting caught staring,
and get a little thrill out of learning their universe.
That's kind of how I feel about 98 Degrees.
They're older, good-looking jock types
who are really close and have this great friendship,
and I'm getting a kick out of just watching them.
O-TOWN
O-Town...
I have great affection for the guys as individuals.
I truly do.
I love Ashley for being young and pretty and chock-full
of feminine qualities.
I love Dan for being a leader, for being gung-ho and
take-charge, for being mature and grounded, and for saying "tooken" instead
of "taken." Dan will always have my respect.
I love Trevor for being sweet and sensitive at the same
time he's telling people the Trevor train done passed them by.
I love Erik because between the first and second albums,
he got much better at that whole singing thing.
And Jacob. My favorite. I love Jacob.
I love the way he looks, I love the way he talks, I love his confidence
and his humility, his smile and his body. I love the way he challenges
people. And I hate his hair.
FIVE
I love these guys because they loved each other.
SAVAGE GARDEN
Darren and Daniel were a beautiful, amazing couple.
They complemented each other perfectly.
They should have been together forever.
It makes me sad that they parted ways,
but what they had was so good, the memory doesn't hurt.
WADE JEREMY ROBSON
Wade.
Wade is evil.
I love it.
By all rights, I should hate him.
I mean, I should want to see the man destroyed.
I could sit here and write up a list of reasons he's
a nasty, nasty little person.
But, oh.
I want to join his harem.
*NSYNC
I've already established my Backstreet love.
That love is so strong, it interferes with my *NSYNC
love.
Is that fair? No. But such is life.
So, no, my Sync love will never be pure,
for my Street love dictates otherwise.
That said, I do love *NSYNC.
It's a deep, layered love, with unexpected twists.
I will admit that it's easier to love the Sync than it
is to love the Street.
They come across quicker as more fun.
Also, I don't worry about them nearly as much.
JC is my most beloved member of *NSYNC,
but Lance has much love and much respect from me.
And let me add that if I didn't love Justin as much as
I do,
I would hate, loathe, and detest him,
so it's a good thing I love him as much as I do.